Tuesday, 15 September 2020

Apparently I'm a Menace to Society. Also a Has-Been.

 So I've been arrested a few times again. Well maybe just the once but I've had to report on bail for a while. It's best I not say anything about the police because you know ... they read here now.

My house got literally figuratively and metaphorically overtaken by rats. I did buy some ratsak wait no scratch that I think I accidentally stole some ratsak but don't tell the police ok? I drove up to the border but couldn't get into Queensland so then I came back again.

I still couldn't get rid of the rats.

My car was stolen, my phone got broken, and my laptop got smashed so I haven't been able to write I'm sorry guys. I have missed you and I mean it. Or as my brother would say when he was little "I rili menit."

Living in this house is terrifying, no women's refuge can take me because I would be a danger to the other clients there because of the people who have been after me. So I just sleep in the day and stay up all night and just wait. I don't know what I'm waiting for ... I guess just to see what's next? What more could possibly happen?

A suspect in a 20-year-old unsolved murder up here in the mountains shouted at me that he was going to cut me up into little pieces like he did Belinda. so that was great for my mental health let me tell you whoops I just accidentally did tell you what can happen now.

I want to rewind time I want my boys to be little again I want to be who I used to be instead of this empty shell. I'm not well can you tell? 

I was back in hospital again. I was in a police holding cell for a while ... there was piss on the walls like who the fuck would piss on the walls? I guess I could have tried to piss on a wall's too but I would have had to get the angle right.

I'm seeing therapists and GP's  and and psychiatrists and everybody tells you just get help get help get help so I am. I'm getting all of the help but none of the help seems to be helping. Conundrum. 

Anyway I gotta go I'm almost at the bridge. Fuck. How am I gonna send this shit out?

To the person who told me I was a Has-Been ... it's better than a Never-Was. And I ain't even finished yet so buckle up sweethearts. Mama's got some boys to fight for. Never underestimate the downtrodden. Ever.

Laters x

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