Thursday, 21 August 2014

ANOTHER Day? Really?

I have to write something just to get the cemetery post off the top of my blog. I visited the cemetery four days ago which is like a hundred years ago really Siri what is time?

How freaky is this world? Has it always been this bad or do we just have the technology to keep up to speed with how bad it actually is? It's freaking me out but I went shopping anyway and unfortunately for Rocco, they were all out of pooface.

 When I got to the checkout the lady beeped my stuff and Dave told me there was $120 in the savings account and $90 in the cheque account so I asked her to do a split payment but I have one of those new "wave" cards so money just got automatically deducted and I didn't know from which account and the people behind me in the checkout got the shits! And I only do words, not numbers! The lady had to CLOSE THE CHECKOUT while I rang Dave, freaking, to transfer money over online because how much is in what account hon WHUT and I was so, so embarrassed. But the checkout lady welcomed closing her aisle and told me she can't do maths either but her niece does, her niece is doing her PHD to become a professor and I said well, the world needs brainy people like her niece to make up for dumbarse people like me and we both laughed and she left to go on her tea break early and thanked ME.

Dave asked for lamb shanks but ever since my butcher Norm told me they were SHEEPS KNEES I cannot eat them so I made a whole roast leg instead and the house smelt like lamb roast instead of stinky boy.

And then I started a family tradition of watching a funny video clip at the end of dinner. It'll probably last for about three more days but hey, it was a great tradition while it lasted.

 I made the boys watch both versions of Tight Pants with Jimmy Fallon. Reannon got me on to Tight Pants and I'm forever grateful. I walk down the street singing Tight Pants in my head it makes walking down the street so much easier.

So then we all watched an entire series of hilarious videos culminating in Rocco demanding to watch the film clip of Cotton Eye Joe while we cleaned up and then this happened.

To think, all these years I thought it was Governor Joe!

Today I opened my eyes and was all oh for gods sake ANOTHER day? We just had one of those yesterday why do they keep coming? I married an early riser. Dave's whistling and getting ready for work without a care in the world even though he does have many cares in the world and I said from underneath the doona "Hon I hate mornings." And he's all OOOHHHHHH EDIE TELL ME SOMETHING I DON'T KNOW and ran over to tickle my feet.

I got up and looked at the veggie garden and thought to myself, one of these days I am going to weed that fucker and start again.

Today is not that day parsley anyone?

That reminds me I REALLY need to trim my pubes. 

I waited for my coffee to pour from the shity machine I bought and put next to Daves ridiculously expensive machine. Give me lazy pods or give me death.

 Then I drove Rocco to school and as I walked him in a sickening feeling came over me. It's book week fancy dress day?

"Um, Rocco, it's book week fancy dress day?"

We were surrounded by pirates and princesses and wild things and dinosaurs and Rocco's standing there in his school uniform, looking up at me.

"It's ok mum I didn't want to get dressed up."

I felt sick, knelt down to look him in the eye, told him we can go straight back home right now and get a costume, we can! And I didn't get a note about this?

"Oh I didn't give you the note mum. I don't want to get dressed up, I just don't."

And he really didn't but still I worried because I know how contrary he is and what if as soon as he sees all of his friends dressed up he wants to be dressed up too WHY IS PARENTING SUCH A MINEFIELD.

I walk him right into his class, his colourful class of book characters. He felt hesitant but then we saw like three other kids sitting on the floor with their school uniform on. I was so relieved and his teacher looked up to greet him and she was dressed up too and you know what she said?

"Oh here's Rocco, another Muggle! Come and sit down please."

Another Muggle. I walked out of school crying at her kindness and care and he's a Muggle. Rocco went to school dressed as a Muggle today and everything's going to be ok.

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