Thursday, 16 May 2013

Washing The Dishes.

I had the idea for time-lapse Buddha ages ago. Saw the sun creeping slowly onto his face one morning and had the idea of making a Vine out of it, so it's all meaningful and shit and I get kudos for being so clever.

At last count, I've tried fourteen times to get it right. Either I miss the sun, or the phone would ring, or the phone would go flat, or I kept pressing the wrong button. I was filled with complete rages during this time. I just want to be clever why won't you behave Buddha I am trying to be all Spiritual.

Then it got funny. I don't even know that much about  Buddhism. I just like how there's no angry, vengeful, catholic god. And also - how could all those chilled out orange-robed guys be wrong?

The very first rehab I went to, at the grand age of 24, I learned nothing. Because I was unteachable. An arrogant, smartarse dickhead. But I did have a torrid love affair with a guy named Eli.

Eli was washing all the twenty sets of dishes one night as I stood there all doey-eyed at him and he said:

"You know, when you wash the dishes .... you should just wash the dishes. Not reflect or think or worry or wander. Just - wash the dishes. That's it."

Eli remains the only person in my life to date to explain Buddhism to me. Being present. Mindfulness.

My therapist told me the other week to narrate what I'm doing in my head. So I have been.

"41 year old woman sits on a chair."  "Drinks glass of water." "Sets table." It's so relieving, and has really helped in settling my anxiety down.

The irony of Buddha making me so furious was not lost on me. Even though I panic while saying good morning at the end ...  I finally did what I set out to do.

PS Top left you can turn the sound on

He's the one sitting on his ledge, knowing all the secrets even though his eyes are shut. I'm the one being a scrambling lunatic.

How do you practice mindfulness?

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Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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