Thursday, 31 January 2013


Yesterday Rocco wanted a toy from one of those $2 machines. He'd been so good, sat so still during all my appointments. I gave him a shiny gold $2 coin which he rolled over in his hands.

He stood at the machine and looked at the assortment of prizes through the glass. And I knew straight away what he was thinking because I am his mother.

"Mum, I want to get ..... it's just .... I just want ..."

He cupped the machine with both hands and bowed his head, overcome with the choices and the knowledge that only one toy would come out and that would be it. One final prize from all those possibilities. He hated not knowing which one he was going to get.

Put his two bucks in, and before he fully turned the dial he looked at me and said,

"Mum. I'm gonna want what I get. I'm just gonna want whatever thing I get." 


The Summer Day - Mary Oliver

Who made the world?
Who made the swan, and the black bear?
Who made the grasshopper?
This grasshopper, I mean -
the one who has flung herself out of the grass,
the one who is eating sugar out of my hand,
who is moving her jaws back and forth instead of up and down -
who is gazing around with her enormous and complicated eyes.
Now she lifts her pale forearms and thoroughly washes her face.
Now she snaps her wings open, and floats away.

I don't know exactly what a prayer is.
I do know how to pay attention, how to fall down into the grass,
how to kneel down in the grass, how to be idle and blessed,
how to stroll through the fields, which is what I have been doing all day.
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?


Thank you for answering me on my last post, telling me who you are. I wish everyone could feel heard and listened to and valued. I have put myself on hold. Feeling it all.

Change is ahead.

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Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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