Thursday, 21 June 2012

I'm Bringin' Donkey Back.

See my face in that photo? It's the proud, triumphant face of a middle child who was allowed to sit on the zebra. I GOT THE ZEBRA, ARSEHOLES! So incredibly thrilled. Behind their Queen sits my three siblings: Linda, Cameron, and Leigh. In Tijuana, Mexico, 1982.

Sad thing was, I looked down and realised I wasn't sitting on a zebra, it was a donkey painted with white stripes. The paint came off and stained my green velvet knickerbockers. I couldn't wait to get off that donkey, and I stank of him all day.

Six years later my sisters, brother, and I clung to a floating beach toy in the ocean. We took it in turns to get up and jump off. We laughed and talked for about an hour out there in the sea.  Our stepdad (my brothers real dad) had just killed himself. We were the shellshocked and broken children, and the only ones on the beach. There was a new sense of camaraderie forged between us that day and I'll never forget it.

Growing up in my family was like an episode of Survivor. We all outlasted our dead dads. We all have our own unique pain around that.

You know what's a direct antidote to unique pain?

Inappropriate humour.

Last year I uploaded this photo onto my sisters Facebook walls, under the heading, "GIRLS: I found dad!"

Our real father was a red-haired Scot. He died from acute alcoholism, yet here he was in my local bookshop, masquerading as Old MacDonald.

Hilarity ensued. Leigh cursed his bushy eyebrow gene. I was all, mate - at least you didn't get the alcoholic gene! Remarks about a dead-dad-in-a-bag being like soap-on-a-rope were made. Microwave popcorn. Most of our Facebook friends were silent and probably appalled .... but we just couldn't help it. We laugh about our dead dads because it's not funny.

My siblings and I have bumbled through adulthood the best we could. Sometimes the worst we could. But we're still all here, trying to kick some goals, make some sense, do meaningful things. It's hard. Life is hard. Sometimes we find ourselves clinging to the wreckage of the past like at the beach all those years ago. Unable to work out how to even get through a stupid day.

Sometimes we stand up and catch a wave, gang-sign to shore like a hero, and we all clap each other like crazy.

                                It's Barrie. It's good.

After a few particularly glorious weeks (sarcasm) ... Linda commented on the Mexico picture yesterday on Facebook. For absolutely no reason at all she wrote "I'm bringing donkey back."

It is the funniest, most ridiculous thing I've heard in a very long time. I love it, especially when sang to the tune of Justin Timberlake's "I'm Bringin" Sexy Back." YEAH.

It doesn't make sense.

Most thing's in life never do.


Me at MamaPop: In the beginning, before all the suicide and death ...  there was Atari.  Confessions Of An 80's Atari Queen


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