The Fancy Lipstick Building.

Last week I flew to Melbourne for a visit with Maybelline New York and Garnier. Before I left the house I ran around making school lunches, assembled a slow-cooked beef stroganoff for the boys' dinner, searched for the right cowboy boots, and broke up two fights.

I was SO impressed with myself when I made it to Sydney airport on time. Waited for the bus shuttle with an apple core in one hand and my phone in the other. Threw the apple in the bin, got on the bus, sat down ... to find the apple still in my hand. MAGIC! I ran up to the bus driver. "Please can you stop I just threw my phone in the bin!!!" He sighed, heavily .. and watched as I put my entire arm into a garbage bin in public.

I got back on and told him thank you, I'm here all week try the veal. He didn't crack a smile.

                                  Snowy Mountains are snowy.

Mrs Woog and I DIDN'T die in a plane crash. We soon arrived at one of the most spectacular hotels in Melbourne, the Cullen. Dave rang to tell me his solicitor saw a photo of Dave on my blog. I replied with how much he would love the art in my hotel room:

I text this photo to Dave. One of Dave's aunts did their Riley family tree, to discover that years ago, the Kelly gang and the Riley clan used to knock about with each other.

Figures.

The next day we went to the building that looks like a lipstick. It was a whirlwind of talented people, new products, beautiful food, and a massage from a guy called Sven.

Bob, showing off his mad Garnier skillz. And kindly not saying a word about my open pores and lank complexion. He used the Three-in-One Pure Wash Scrub and Mask ... so refreshing. (My husband, step kids and I will all fight over it can share it.)

This thing?

GAMECHANGER, aka the volumising Garnier Fructis Thermo-Active Spray. Best thing I have ever used on my hair - gives this volume and texture to it. I'll be using it for the rest of my life.

When we got to the tanning section, I told them about my unfortunate tanning incident of 1985. I stole my mums fake tan and took it to school for a sports carnival. Great idea, right? I thought it would work straight away. I slathered and slathered - nothing. Over the next few days, two things happened:

1) My mum was looking for her missing fake tan. I feigned innocence.
2) I started turning a curious shade indeed. Especially the skin in between my fingers.

My mum and sisters then kind of knew, who stole the fake tan. (YA THINK!?)

It's safe to say that tans have now come a long way.

We were then shown by THE Nigel Stanislaus how to apply makeup. And what colours were good, how to blend. All the things I never learnt. I got by in my twenties with some red lip liner in my back pocket and regular eyelash tints ... it's only as I grow older that my need to use makeup has increased. Especially with concealers and foundation.

Nigel made me laugh, taught me tips, and matched me up with the Maybelline Fit Me Creamy Natural

They all said I would love these Colour Tattoo gel eyeshadows and I do. Mine is called "Too Cool." And it really is.

Nigel looks humble and teary, like he just won an Oscar for Best Makeup. (My stepson walked past just now, looked at that photo and laughed. "Your bicep looks like it's sitting in a hammock." No words.)

Georgia deserves massive props for putting this whole thing together. And for realising the huge value for brands in working with bloggers, both with outreach campaigns and digital advertising. Ahead of your game, Georgia.

She even put together a little something at the end of the day, after Mrs Woog and I sat for an hour talking to all of the executives and account directors about blogging and social media in Australia:

Mrs Woog superimposed over her own hair dye ... and me superimposed over RUBY ROSE'S BODY. Georgia's tagline for my mock-ad? "You can't outrun your shadow .. because you're born with it."


We flew home weary but looking FABULOUS. Got home at 10.30pm to find Dave waiting on the couch, hoping to strike it lucky with his glamour wife. He did.

The next morning I plucked the longest chin hair I've had in quite some time. It would have been there the whole day and everybody saw it and nobody said a goddamn thing.

Disclaimer: Maybelline New York is sponsoring me to fly to New York to attend BlogHer in August. I was given products to try, a hotel room, and a non-crashing airplane flight to Melbourne. I didn't have to write about or link to any of these products ... but they're so good I can't not. This post has been sponsored by my chin hair and my hammock bicep.

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