Last Monday Maybelline New York sent me to Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week in Sydney. I was DREADING it. Told my colleague Mrs Woog in the taxi that I didn't want to go.
Me: "I'm seriously scared. Completely out of my comfort zone. Wish I cancelled."
Mrs Woog: "So, you can travel to remote villages in Africa ... but you're scared of Fashion Week?"
I'm going to confess something right now .. I never learned how to put makeup on. I went to too many schools to settle down with one steadfast group of girlfriends, I never followed fashion, and was pretty much a dork. Until I hit twenty years old and had so much pent-up rage that I exploded on the Sydney nightclub scene like a meteor.
A really angry, sexy meteor.
I'm now forty years old, still put eyeshadow on with my finger, not entirely sure which foundation is best for me ... and I'm Maybelline's latest covergirl.
KIDDING. I'm not their new covergirl, but they ARE sponsoring me to fly to BlogHer New York this year. I'm guessing they teamed up with me because they want to crack the mum market. They could have easily chosen a Gen Y beauty blogger, a young minx with no age spots or wrinkles. One day soon, Mrs Woog and I will fly to L'Oreal Head Office to get Maybelline NY and Garnier makeovers. I've never had a makeover .. not a physical one, anyway. More of a spiritual one.
Fashion Week wasn't as bad as I feared. I have a lot of judgement around hip cool airkissy people, but the ones I met were surprisingly refreshing and real. Nigel Stanislaus was the official make-up artist for Maybelline NY this week and he is the least-pretentious guy out. Homie Nikki Parkinson from Styling You blogged from Fashion Week every day .. I could not do what she did.
My favourite part of the day was this:
Ruby Rose and Krink. (I was wearing a black $7.95 t-shirt from K-mart, odd socks, and unmatching bra and undies. Thank god for the toughness of a black leather jacket.)
Ruby is the proper Ambassador for Maybelline NY. We compared neck tattoos and I kind of fell in love with her. (Mrs Woog worked out the math, told me I was technically old enough to be her mother.) Krink is a famous street artist who was brought to Australia by Maybelline NY to create some art installations. We talked about bloggers, social media, 'real' writers, talent .. at the beginning of our conversation he made me jump through hoops. I'm a good hoop jumper. All I was thinking was "ACT COOL ACT COOL."
I'm looking forward to learning some makeuppy things. It's about bloody time .. the angry meteor has landed. It looks tired.
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I drove home after my big star-spotty day and got caught in traffic behind a hearse. After thinking fashion things all day ... I sat there wondering what the corpse was wearing.
Are you makeuppy or fashiony? Were you born that way?