Wednesday, 5 October 2011

Fully sick!

I have manflu, now with added manperiod! It's a special kind of hell, doing all the parenting and cooking and washing when you're sick. Dave finally got home yesterday. We were standing in the kitchen and I was forcing myself to be nice, not bitchy. Then he said, "Oh I've missed you!"

And at the exact moment I said, "Hon that's so nice!" He finished off his sentence with ".... coffee machine."

My mouth dropped open and he grabbed me to do a funny dance.

No. No funny dance.

I went to bed after making dinner and showering Rocco and putting him to bed - and I watched three back-to-back episodes of Downton Abbey. Dave tossed and turned and I silently dared him to say something. But he knew better and put a pillow over his head and went to sleep.

This morning he walked around to my side of the bed, where a calvacade of used tissues lay on the floor and he kissed me gently on the cheek. "I love you hon."

I grunted. If I didn't have a thousand horses pounding in my temples I would have said, "Shouldn't you be telling that to the goddamn coffee machine??!"

Mid-morning I came back to bed. To see this:

Look closely, underneath the mountain of dust on my wooden sailboat I place next to my bed for my Soul to sail off onto during dreamtime.

And I climbed back into bed and collapsed and my heart grew warm and all was forgiven. That's all it takes.


I have a follow-up post to write on the Anti-Social Media I published the other day. SO many thought-provoking comments on it.

I also have a big fat heavy vlog that is weighing on my heart so I'll goddamn just do it this week. When I *don't* look 100. And then, a light follow-up vlog afterwards, to make everything ok again.

But first I need to sleep. I feel shizenhausen ... but I have lavender from my lover and it's helping me get through.

PS Men readers, avert your eyes ..... ladies, does your monthly cycle get worse as you get older? I'm not joking about the manperiod.

PPS I was interviewed in BlogHUB HERE

PPPS Dave, if you really are reading my blog now, don't talk to me about it. I don't want it critiqued. Go away. I love you X



  1. Ah manflu sucks! I hope you feel better soon . . . but if not, make certain to leave the coffee maker to anyone but Dave. ;)

  2. I read that without noticing that you were talking about your husband and assumed you were dancing with the office gay!

    Needless to say, after the second read I understood why you were having a hard time ;-)

  3. awwww feel better soon ( i did have to laugh at the PPPS to Dave though - freaking awesome!


  4. Eden im 25, I havent had a period in almost 4 years, yet once a month im the bitch from hell! I really hope it doesn't get worse :)
    I love the lavender from your lover.
    Its the small things babe. The small things that sing the loudest. xx

  5. Just two things:

    You are such a writer that I have to "force myself" to not be jealous.

    I love that you place your soul somewhere safe to rest during the night. I need to remember to do this too.

    Hope you're feeling better soon.

  6. Hope you're feeling better soon...

    Downton Abbey is awesome.

  7. It did seem that sometime after I turned 40 that time of the month did get worse. Not sure if that is common or not. Now 47 and just wish it was done with!

  8. I could kill for a day in bed right about now. So effing tired and over it.

    You have yourself a good man. He may be a larikin but he's a good man.

  9. I freak my husband out by saying I'm getting closer to menopause. That usually shuts him up if he comments on my fish-wifeyness at certain times of the month.

  10. My husband practically had an orgasm when I told him I'd be taking the kids up to see my parents for 10 days in November without him.

    I'd say he would miss being cooked for but his mum always jumps at the chance to feed him while I'm gone ;-)

  11. Periods change with your health and age. Mine are finally becoming bearable now my scoliosis is treated with Chiro.
    Hubby can even speak to me, without checking if I am holding any "domestic implement that may cause physical damage", first.
    Check out your ovaries! Ovarian cysts (there are 5 kinds and only one is scary) can do allllll sorts of funny things to your cycle.
    Manflu sucks. Especially with children. *hugs*

  12. I just blogged about my bleed this week too. It came back with the viciousness of a serial killer. was. not. happy. PMS was TERRIBLE. Bleed was worse. ugh. shudder.

  13. Yes it has been just one of the many delights of turning 40, periods from hell that come and go when the goddamn please..vile!!!

    Feel better soon xoxo

  14. man period = hormones (or mormons as they are referred to in this house), fixable through getting rid of what is shitting us off in our lives, more sleep, good food and moving (exercising) our hot asses

  15. The short answer is yes.

    I was bitching (whining) to my GP about this a few months ago - that my skin is a lot worse, that my PMT is atrocious, that ovulating is really painful (W.T.F.) and period pain has returned with a vengeance.

    He said welcome to getting older. Can you fucking believe it? Being a woman can sometimes blow big meaty chunks.

  16. Yes, I think your period abso- fuckin-lutely gets worse. I've tried taking evening primrose but this 'pre menopause' just bites it.

    How sweet is Dave & his lovely lavender?? Awwwwww, getting all teary now, soon I'll have a hot flush.


  17. How far we've come from "Hon, what's a blog?"

    That just makes me laugh for some reason!!!

    Love you -- hope you feel better soon -- it is awful to be sick.



  18. I have enough hormones & pimples to rival ten 15-year old girls trapped inside me. Which makes me just delightful almost every day of every month. I'm 44 & menopause can't come quick enough!!

    With me and my real 15-year old daughter cycling 17 year old son has learned all he's going to need to be a thoughtful, non-commenting, lavender-bearing husband one day ;-)

  19. Oh noes, manflu AND the more-moans of PMS? Poor Eden, what a week. At least your Dave realised his grave error and tried to make up for it with sweet flowers :)

    Mayhaps I should try this vlogging as a way to break my bloggers block...

  20. Sorry that you're sick! I hope you feel better soon.

    Also, I would love some flowers next to my dust =)

  21. My darling Eden, you know I love and adore you like the sister I never had. But let me be very clear. Women can not get the manflu because you have a vagina. You just have the normal flu which is scientifically proven to be much less fatal than the manflu. I speak on behalf of all men who have to suffer in so much more pain and discomfort than women folk when riddled with flu. Just needed to get that off my hairless chest.

    As I say to my many lovers "Man-up honey!"

    And Dave's hot! And manly. He can leave lavender on my bedside table any day!


  22. Shizenhousen may just be my new favourite word. For which I thank you. x

  23. That us EXACTLY all it takes.

    We are women.

  24. As always, I want to write a million things in response to your recent posts, but I just thought you should know that your manfluperiod is contagious. Thanks. A whole lot. And I have to spend tomorrow with my inlaws for thanksgiving and they have a cat, to which I'm allergic. If you feel the Earth's gravitational field shift slightly, it will be because of the epic volumes of snot and blood I'm generating in Moose Jaw (no lie, that's what the city is called where they live.)

  25. Yes. They get worse then right when you FINALLY schedule surgery to rid yourself of them....they stop. They call it menopause. It's when you realize that all those years you wanted to smother your husband, were just a warm-up.


Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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