Tuesday, 27 September 2011

Showing You.

Hey - thank you. For coming here, reading along and wishing me well. I suck so hard at replying back and emailing and tweeting you and showing my thanks. Blogging is an incredibly odd thing ... especially in this "personal memoir" genre that I seem to find myself in. Strange. Sometimes, I get the feeling that people come and think, oh man - what's that crazy bitch gone and done now? I sense PR's and media people come here and think - this? This is what we have to work with?

Why yes, yes it is. I'm not a brand, or a conglomerate, or even a business. I'm just a dickhead.

Truth is, emails like the one I got last week make me understand why I do this. A beautiful woman sent me the most GORGEOUS email about what my cowboy boots mean to her and her mum. It was just so nice, and blew me away.

Computer, you blow me away.

What even is blogging? When you get all self-conscious about it, it just feels SO DUMB. Which is why I pretend that only ten people are reading. Ten close friends, who only wish the best for me. I think, the biggest reason I blog is for a kind of show and tell. Like, being at the beach and turning over stones and bits of debris and beautiful shells ... and running here to show you all. And then, in your posts and your words and love, you show me stuff back.

Thanks for having some kind of strange faith in me. Thanks for giving a shit. Thanks for your encouraging words and kindness. It all goes straight to my heart, like a kind of reward. I appreciate it much much more than you'll ever know. Definitely more than I'll ever know.


Today we went to the beach for the first time in a long time. I bought helmets and we rustled up enough bikes. The kids groaned when I made them wear them ... then Dave turns to me and says, "Oh no hon, I'm not going to wear one." Oh yes he was. And he did. And after Rocco shouted the whole place down, he realised he loved his new bike seat after all.

Hon! We are just a normal helmet family right now in this moment!

I even packed a paw paw and lime and a knife and spoons and we took turns eating the flesh. I told Dave the very first time I tried it was when he made it for me on our honeymoon, in our hotel room after days of eating crap. He smiled a smile that I know means he's pleased that I remembered. I looked into his beautifully aging eyes and told him he was a good Spirit, sent straight to me.

                 The only thing I have stabbed during PMS week.

I cuddled Dave and watched them all play beach cricket and I had the biggest lump in my throat. Just from being alive, in the moment.

That's all. That's enough.


And I plucked this season's first shell from the sand .. like the beach version of the first blossom of spring.

And I knew I had to show you.


  1. Beautiful, thank you.
    And big hugs for whatever it is that's going on in your world right now.

  2. <3 You hold tight to this moment. It sounds precious.

  3. Yeah, it's all a bit weird when you think about it. But we humans have always had an insatiable desire to share and share and share. Thank you for sharing. Your words are beautiful. x

  4. Thanks for showing me the shell. I like it a lot and had a little ceramic daydream about white plates with blue swirly bits. Thank you.

    As for pretending about the readers I hear you. If I think of all the people who would do me mischief that I KNOW are reading my blog I begin to hyperventilate. So I think of a line I read in a now "locked down" blog. She started her post with the words, "Well internet, now it is just you and me" and then went on to write the most beautiful and intensely personal stuff that I had trouble remembering to breathe as I read the post.

    Her words stay with me. and so I write some posts as if no-one is reading. Because if I didn't , I wouldn't write at all. Then the unwritten words would eat my brain.

  5. First up.... I love Dave's shorts.

    Secondly, if I ever wrote my blog, stopped to read it knowing that my in-laws, my kids teachers, the school Principal, the unfriendly school mums and all my ex bosses read it? Well then it would be as boring as talking about real estate.

    Who the fuck cares who reads it. Just write it xxxxx

  6. One word still comes to mind for me. Legend. It is like I am a gushing fan with a huge crush on her first boy band, except you are a chick and, well, you may think I am in fact weird and crazy (I want to insert *twitch* in here but I think it might be getting old).

    If you stopped writing your beautifully honest and raw and real blog I think I would cry. Please don't stop. Ever.

    Love, your stalker. xo

  7. What Mrs. Woog says. I sometimes even have to forget that Pal reads my stuff when I'm not looking. It's not hidden from him, everything I write is ours, our family's. But it's my view of our family and I know sometimes he doesn't agree (or doesn't like being my bad guy). But he said to me a little while ago: "It's you, Dais. Wouldn't want it any other way."
    Thank you for sharing, I love to stop in and see what you've been up to, see how you've been and know that it's REALLY you.

  8. I don't hink you are a dickhead, I think you are beautiful, inside & out, & so are your words. I love reading your blog.

  9. Thank you for your 'show and tell'.
    Beats the heck out of the 6 year old version I am subjected to at work.
    Until they bring in tampon treasure, or Mum's pink fluffy handcuffs. (Truth.)
    You're real and flawed and sweary and beautiful and deep all at once.

  10. Oh I love this so much!! You capture that moment perfectly where you suddenly realise there is nowhere else you would rather be.

    I have a very similar approach to blogging, and am totally surprised when anyone reads my brain vomit!

    Enjoy your moment!

  11. You seem to be at peace on your break, with your shells and bike rides and plants growing in the shower.

    Love you, dickhead (and I mean that in the bestest way ever).

  12. I'm just a dickhead - this made me spit out my stupid tea. Man.... I see you. I really do x

  13. You're right - it IS kind of a show and tell. It's also you holding up a mirror of truth and daring us to take a look. Encouraging us to dig deep and blog our own truths, even when it isn't pretty. Because you were brave enough to pave the way.
    It's always so nice to see you have these wonderful moments with your family. A man who will wear a helmet as example to his kids and to please his wife? That's love :-)

  14. Insert witty yet touching comment here.

    P.S. Dave has hot legs.

  15. I put my hand up to be one of those 10 readers. Thought about you lots over the last couple of days x

  16. I know you don't reply.
    That's OK too.
    I am very pleased that you are finding some FAMILY time is good as good can be.
    Your New Eyes post helped me admit I have had 2 bad days of not good thoughts..about me..so, letting you know I am glad that you could help me (one of the 10) get a better outlook happening... D X

  17. Show and tell with shells and rocks. You nailed it!

  18. What can I say, the peace and happiness in this post in simple contagious and thanks for sharing!

    Also, I was going to comment, not on Dave's legs but on the fact that he bike seat might be too low . . . if his knees were aching after the ride that is why. Sorry for being a total knowitall . . . I am really not . . . I just have bad knees.

  19. Kirsty Rice (via Twitter) sent me over and I am glad for that. I love your writing so much.

    Daze of Whine and Rpses - I read some of your blog too. I can't see everything because Blogger shows in Korean here. Are you on Twitter?


  20. Life.

    The untouchable speechless moments of life, that drip with something we can only close our eyes and mouths to say.

    High Five to this delicious syrupy pause you're in.

    Lap up its stickiness.

    I love you , woman.

    And, also, gasping: I have silver toes, too.

  21. I hope I'm one of the original ten.

    A girl gets a little territorial sometimes...but you know I pretend there are only ten people reading too .. but only because I've never been at ease in large crowds or parties...and if I think of myself of just a bit of a handful...well...that's a dinner party in a comfortable house strewn with well-loved things... and that, that I can do.


    Love you,


  22. I love your blog so much, and I'm convinced the reason why is because you're able to show yourself. I imagine that's kind of heavy when you think about it. I was just thinking the other day about how one of my favorite blog posts was when you changed over from Top Cat to Eden Riley. I was so moved by you throwing off the veil and telling the world who you are! You're Eden F-ing Riley! Take it or leave it! And we're all taking it, as much as we can get.

    I'm glad you and your normal helmet family are having a wonderful time at the beach. Thanks for showing yourself.


  23. I totally get you. Does that make me a crazy bitch too? I sure hope so. Lots of people don't get me, so I can relate. But those that do, I just LOVE them and make them forever friends. Cause there are so many people that SUCK. So you have to sort through the sand and find the prettiest and most special shells to treasure forever! My family and I went to the beach this past weekend and got some pretty shells too. Your shell looks kinda like an eyeball. Cool!! It's keeping an eye on you!! Lisa :)

  24. Did you know you have become the therapist? we all know how much you give in your writting that we don't expect you to reply or respond to everything.

    Did I mention that my parents are therapist.....

    Shhh... I think I might have told her about you so she could refer it to clients that would ummmm be like minded.

    Oh and they where both school teachers then therapists, so mixed with their oh so nice teacher voices and trying to solve the problems of all who surrounded them....... So fun!

    They swear just as much as you Eden , they just never write it down.

    So thankyou Eden you touch people far more than you will EVER know.

  25. Damn..... Her is Ment to be my mum. Fuck it! Fav parents word really!

    Oh they are going to be so pleased, I am ruining their reputation! Ha!

  26. I love this. How right you are calling it show and tell. Beautiful words Eden.

  27. I love your blog. Never commented before...but I think you are fantastic. And inspiring. And much stronger than you give yourself credit for. Thats all. :)

  28. I love your blog. Never commented before...but I think you are fantastic. And inspiring. And much stronger than you give yourself credit for. Thats all. :)

  29. Gorgeous... as always Miss Eden xx

  30. It must be very unusual - you sometimes have such a low opinion of yourself (see: I'm a dickhead), and yet you have all of these people who are fascinated by what you have to say. I know that you're grateful that people read, and I also suspect that you believe we're all just watching and waiting for the train wreck that you are always half expecting. That's not true though - you are inspirational, because you acknowledge that life is tough. And that life is beautiful. And that life is ugly. And that people are wonderful and awful. And that all of this can happen at the same time. You're really a modern day philosopher, who's working through an interpretation of life and the universe.

    So keep up the good work - you're helping us all interpret this life.

  31. You really know how to describe a perfect moment. Not because anything super-duper is happening, but because you notice an ordinary moment and it becomes extraordinary just by the noticing.

    Been thinking of you. Jealous, actually. That our summer is going away and yours is just about there.


  32. Blogging is this weird, beautiful, crazy thing right?

    I feel like giving up, basically every second or third day. And when I take the whole damn thing way too seriously and start being mean to myself, I just remember that I'm doing it to write love letters to my son.

  33. You are making me jealous!

    I'de never get the Workaholic on a bike or in a helmet for that matter and a lovely spontaneous day? No way!

    You are blessed.

  34. Happy Spring. I really love your blog. So keep on. Please? :-)

  35. I will always look at whatever you show me. Always.

  36. Love your words. And the beach. There's something about salty air that aids and abets happiness. Looking forward to many more shells.

    PS Have been searching for your Lawrence Powell quote for my writing desk noticeboard. Yay! Found it. Comment Kharma...

  37. I love this. I love your line "I'm not a brand, or a conglomerate, or even a business. I'm just a dickhead." I completely agree. Not that you're a dickhead, but you know what I mean.

    I can't wait to keep reading and seeing all the beautiful shells you turn over!

  38. your bike trip looks amazing. i am a little jealous.

  39. You know Eden, every time I read your blog you show me a little something about myself. You always strike a nerve with me. Thanks for being such a gorgeous dickhead x

  40. That's all. That's enough.

    Beautiful as always. Keep on keeping on because I love the way you write, and if your a dickhead then you are an inspirational dickhead xoxo

  41. Funny...I have never come here and thought you were a crazy bitch. Maybe that just makes us two crazy bitch peas in the same bitch pod:P I don't know you at all, but I dig you.

  42. I'm going through that 'this feels weird' period re blogging at the moment. But I'm writing more stuff that I want to write for myself. Maybe that doesn't appeal to many, but I don't really care. 'Tis for moi!


  43. Where I'm from bicycle helmets are law. Safety first! Thanks for showing us all you do. I love the shell.

  44. where's the like button?

  45. I have the hugest lump in my throat after reading that, Eden.


    Just beautiful.

  46. awww lovely shell
    And lovely post.

    I like the what of how you describe your life, real and honest but not pigeonholable

  47. Blogging is weird when you think about it, isn't it! Best not to think too much and just do it. I think.

  48. Can I go on a bike trip with you someday? I promise to wear a helmet.


Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...