Monday, 22 August 2011

Deep Purple

On Saturday I had to wear purple to a party so with a few hours to spare I went shopping. Ended up with just a pair of purple prayer beads because nobody makes good purple clothes. I ended up RUNNING into shops .. "S'cuse me do you have anything purple?" The shop assistants invariably always asked why. I was tired and manic, so I told them the truth: a purple drink company called Ribena had sponsored me to fly across the world for a blogging convention and now they were throwing me a party in Sydney where the dress code was purple. It made perfect sense, but not to the eye-rolly shop assistants. In the end, I did the only thing I knew how ... took the piss out of myself on the internet. On Instagram, actually. Do you know I found out Amy Winehouse was dead via Instagram? Almost as crazy as finding out Osama Bin Laden was dead via twitter. I rang Dave with that one. He jeered at me, "Oh, how do you know that? Did TWITTER tell you?"

I lied and told him that NO, I saw it on the TV. And I felt bad that twitter had told me about the death of the most hunted and hated man in the world. But no more - I will take a stand in solidarity for social media goddamit. This is why America are leaders of the free world - because you walk into a clothes shop and check in on facebook to claim the free discount code for jeans on sale and nobody rolls their eyes at all.

I actually thought that I might wear this top:

                        Isn't it Divine? (Brown)

In each shop I was getting more desperate. There were a slew of outfits, until I just surrendered and kept picking the most RIDICULOUS things to try on, just so I could upload the pics to my Instagram/twitter feed. To keep my people happy. Because this shit was FUNNY.

                   Ironic mummyblogger baby gut that never went away.

The shop assistants would look puzzled when I asked them if I could try my purple bounty on - especially the beanie. When I finally sped off - late, I downloaded Eminem's greatest hits to listen to in the car. I remembered and rapped every single lyric and voice inflection to Cleanin' out my Closet and was a hero in my mind. Arrived to a room full of bloggers at Mrs Woogs house, we went to the party where we had to act all professional.

I had originally asked Dave to come. Surprisingly, he said no. So I asked my two sisters instead. I rang them on the way, remembering what they were like after a few sherbets. Had to actually ask them to please not heckle me during my speech, and please stay away from any Important Executives. Worlds then collided when my blogging buddies met my sisters. Us Three Barrie Sisters are quite the cards. And very, very shy.

It was a great night. There were even cocktails named after us - a LOT of Mrs Woogs were drank. Dranken. Drunk. My cocktail, the Eden, was a mocktail. But there was a typo on the menu which listed vodka in it. A few people made mention to me that there was, in fact, vodka in my mocktail and to be careful. I wondered what would happen, if I relapsed at a blogging event packed with some of the best bloggers in town, my sisters, and the very people I was trying to show gratitude to and impress.

I don't know - but I DO know that I would still be out right now, in Sydney, if I did.

I put together a slideshow for the event, of our travels overseas. I'd never made a slideshow before and taught myself how at 2am in the morning last week. When I eventually crept to bed, Dave woke up and was cranky and I said Mate! I was putting Rocco back in his bed!

He didn't believe me. He always knows when I lie. He loves the way I lie.

The party went really well - thank you to everybody who came and to the organisers for putting it on. I congratulated Naked Communications and Ribena for pioneering the way for other Aussie bloggers. Soon these kinds of things will be the norm. Until then, social media and its uses remain a delicious secret, shocking the crap out of all unsuspecting sales assistants in Penrith Plaza.

Me and Squiggly Rick ended up having an accidental amazing time. He did not flinch when I regaled him with some choice shocking stories. It was fascinating to be out in Sydney on a Saturday night. The memories! At times I felt wistful, wanting to be twenty three again. Tough and angry and owning the night. But it always came at such a huge cost. At one point I accidentally bumped into a guy as I was walking down the street. Immediately I said sorry, and the guy goes, "You will be if you do it again." He was not joking. Oh how Squiggly Rick and I laughed! Part of me wanted to go right back there and get all up in his face. I could have - I only masquerade as an idiotic middle-aged woman.

When I got back home yesterday, Rocco kissed me on the cheek and told me to NOT  EVER wipe that kiss off mum. Max proudly showed me his new bum comic he had drawn, he wants to photocopy it ten times and charge his friends 50c each. I had a sore back and throat and legs and feet. The old grey mare she ain't what she used to be.

I've felt a huge tug lately, from my creative life clashing with my home life. Then, in the quiet times late at night when everybody's asleep .. I marvel at the fact that I have any kind of life at all.


  1. That first top was awesome!

    I saw the photos, it looked like a lot of fun. I was jealous. Sydney needs to move closer to Melbourne, so we can start going to each other's events.

    And I have so many purple clothes...!

  2. YOU are awesome, damn I missed being there on Saturday night.

    And who are UMG who have blocked this video in my country due to copyright? I need to seeeeeeee!

    PS; My fave outfit was Britney after baby - closely followed by mlkmaid. Ha!

  3. This: "I've felt a huge tug lately, from my creative life clashing with my home life. Then, in the quiet times late at night when everybody's asleep .. I marvel at the fact that I have any kind of life at all."

    So much this.

  4. My little girls are having a boogy in the lounge to your slideshow.

    Your trip looked amazeballs.

  5. Laughing my ass off at the purple outfits you were trying on...too funny. And, absolutely LOVE your slide show.

  6. I am in my office laughing so hard...Dolly!!! killed it. Me and Luce are in stitches :)

  7. I used to wear mainly black. When I was in hospital recovering from my 'major depressive disorder' I had to buy a few clothes from the local Big W becasue I was in for longer than I thought. (Yay!). I started wearing purple and people started complimenting me. And I found out purple is a healing colour. And Ribena and the colour purple has sponsored you. That kind of says it all, doesn't it?

  8. I happily stalked the hashtag on the night and I have loved seeing all the photos of you all having a blast.

    Sometimes I think I'm too busy documenting to actually be living and sometimes I think that the documenting is why I actually enjoy the living part.

  9. I find EVERYTHING out on Twitter. Everything. I even tell my journalism students that if they want to be in any way up-to-date on the goings-on of the world, they need to get a twitter, STAT!

    PS Cleaning out my Closet is my favourite. Awesome when you're angry <3

  10. You look great with your hair done. You look like a totally different person to when I watched your video after the US trip. One of the kindie teachers said to me the other day, "Your hair looks nice, so shiny".
    "Yeah, I washed it!", said I.

    Do you suffer this affliction?

    PS. I'm new, my name is Mother Dear. Can you please visit my new blog and leave a comment, I feel like a real bloser (blog-loser) because I decided to blog and it's sooo lonely, no one wants to play.

    PPS. I saw you on the tele and you are strangely inspiring.

    Yours Truly
    Mother Dear

  11. Veronica hit the nail on the head.

    You know when you read something and it just make you exhale...

    Eden - WOW

  12. I love that purple shirt actually -- I'm constantly in love with your ability to give yourself over to the moment...and as for home life and creativity -- well ...

    *long silence*

    Yes, there's that. I feel like I just can't steal time for what I need and want to do because of obligations -- some I love, some I don't...

    Perhaps when I am an old woman...


  13. Yay, Ribena, for being able to see the awesome that is you and sharing it with the world.

  14. I found out about Bin Laden on husband sneered at me as well. Those boys.

  15. I love the pics, which purple did you choose?? You said just beads, so maybe you wore just the beads? :) And I love how much you mention Eminem, he is SUCH a genious! I cannot ever get anough of him. "2 trailer park girls go round the,outside!" hahahahahaa! And Shake That Ass For Me! Oh how I love them all! Lisa

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  17. late at night when everybody's asleep .. I marvel at the fact that I have any kind of life at all."

    my favourite line in the whole post, you write beautifully xoxo

  18. I love an outfit montage. I def think you should have worn that top and ONLY that top and you would have fitted in much better with the crew roaming up and down George Street on a Satdee night. Seriously, has the world forgotten about pants? x

  19. you rocked it.

    all of it.

    fucking awesome.


  20. 'Twas a fabuloso night and LOVED dancing around hangbags with you. A Satdee night just doesn't get any better.

    Loved the montage on Sat...and loved it again. Fantastic stuff.


  21. Argh. Shitty hotel internet means no video for me. :(

    I love purple! And I love your instructions to your sisters...

  22. LOVE the slideshow! Having all fond Dolly Parton memories. (WEll. NOt the memories were I got called Dolly Parton a lot because of my sizeable assets. The memories where my Mum played Dolly Parton a lot. Totally different). ;-)

    You should have gotten a Ribena Purple Tattoo instead.

  23. What friggin gut are you talking about, Woman? If that's a gut, then I want a gut.
    What a totally awesome night. But they should have carved an iced Purple Berry into an EdenLand figure. Yes. That would have been befitting.

  24. I'm glad you enjoyed your party.

    And those purple tops..!! Classic. What would you have done if you arrived and someone was WEARING the top one? Well....!?

    I probably would've snorted laughing. But that's just me. Haha.

  25. Creative life, home life. Sigh. I know where you're at.


Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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