My sister Linda came to stay with me last week. I was was bit nervous, because she has been on a complete health kick for a while now. It's safe to say that she is skinner than me. SPEWING!
Not really, she deserves it. She's worked hard, and actually did a marathon in Sydney a few weeks ago. She looks and feels fantastic:
Blurry but HOT
Until now ... so annoying that I can't drop the weight with utterly no effort. I actually have to WORK for it now, and it's so insulting. Stupid work.
When Linda was here last week, she kept complimenting my boobs, and I was all, yeah they look great when I'M FAT. And she laughed and I didn't care, really. She wanted to come along with me to Pump. I said of course. And I took photos of her while she wasn't looking. Part of my job as an annoying little sister:
::
Then we got home and I raided the pantry and she ate - some cardboard or something. And we laughed at my boobs again and she asked can she take a photo of my fat - I said of COURSE! And I looked at it, mournfully, and told her I would never, ever post it on my blog.
You KNOW what's coming, don't you?
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Aint no tuckin that fat suit in.
So it's official - I have the gut of Norm from Life. Be In It, aka 1979:
No no NO THIS WILL NOT DO.
I begged Linda to take another photo. Pleaded. As soon as she stopped crying, she did.
Wow. MY BOOBS ARE HOT.
ReplyDeleteJesus woman, even at your fattest you've got nothing on me. Own it. Love it. Or don't.
ReplyDeleteNice rack sister.
ReplyDeleteMy Budda belly is bigger and my boobs are smaller and NO I won't post a pic dammit.
Hey I'm not a wacky red boot wearing woman like somepeople...wink.
My pelvic floor can't handle this. Norm! You rock so hard it's not funny. No. It's not. (I told you, this friggen pelvic floor... it's annihilated)
ReplyDeleteI have to say you made me smile with this one. I can almost picture your conversation with your sister. Lol.
ReplyDeleteBesides, you are not a doughy (okay I have to add that I missed a letter and my iPhone changed "doughy" to "douche". Thank goodness I saw that before I posted this comment. I would have died!) doughboy! And uou do have great boobs!
Proud owner of a fatass!
ReplyDeleteCripes, Eden, I ASPIRE to your 'fatness'...
ReplyDeleteAt least your boobs look great, right? LOL
ReplyDeleteI see your body in the mirror every day, except I wasn't graced to have the gorgeous face to top it off so beautifully. I remember shopping the racks for size 1 and size 2 clothes. Now I have to shop for the clothes that are a combo of those two numbers.
ReplyDeleteYou look good, but I think it's the positive attitude that makes the you look perfect.
I just need to say .. I'm poking fun of myself, and I hope people don't get offended. Am I offending people again?
ReplyDeleteI am carrying extra kilos, and not bothering to do anything about it, because HOMER HUDSON ANZAC COOKIE ICE CREAM.
And I'm allowed to blatantly take the piss out of myself because I harbour no deeply ingrained weight issues. (Yet). I just hope nobody sees this as an insult to them - I'm too self-obsessed for that, really.
Thank you, Yo-Yo Mama! And Stacie, Imma letchu finish but I am the greatest douche of all kind!
ReplyDeleteAlso .. I have to jump through circles to get a stupid comment published here - how incredibly annoying. GOOGLE.
Lastly, it was either post this light-hearted, fun look at myself today, or a really fucked-up post on how low my Spirit is and how I do not know how I am going to live the rest of my life. Fat trumps despair!
I love that you do this!!!!! And your boobs do look hot by the way... :) xx
ReplyDeleteI'm not even going to talk about your Norm-ness, cause mate I'd beat you in a gut challenge any day of the week....
ReplyDeleteThe only thing I want to know: There's such a thing as Anzac bikkie ice cream. Stop. it. now. I need that ice cream.
Wow your sister looks HOT! And so much skinnier than you!!! Nice rolls Doughboy xoxoxo
ReplyDeleteP.S. Was wondering what you needed your MOBILE for in the middle of that class. Only you mate, only you...
I know the feeling I had to work my arse off after number 3 child and finally when I got back to being slender what do I come to discover - I'm pregnant with number 4 child - then I go back to binge eating (as I do when I'm pregnant) and put on over 20kgs. I think I ate 9 cupcakes yesterday and about 5 sausage sandwiches - oh the shame!!!
ReplyDeleteEden you are a riot. And brave. I agree you have nice boobs. ~crow
ReplyDeleteSuck it in a little more! You nearly have a six pack there. And yeah, your breasts are seriously fabulous! You have great arms too, but is that getting creepy now? Or did it get creepy when I started talking about your breasts? Either way you're gorgeous. Don't go changing. Unless you really want to... You see how loaded this topic is? And NO WAY, your butt totally does not look fat in that! ;)
ReplyDeleteI love you guys.
ReplyDeleteLinda, congrats on the marathon. Ditto on the hot. Eddie, you are still much closer to having abs than I will ever be now. I'm not sure, but I think the waitress in the Chinese restaurant asked me if I was pregnant (right after she asked me how old Patrick was -- 11 mo). Somehow that had never happened before. Can't say that any more. Is it a better kind of fat if people think you're "just" pregnant? Whatever. I have been threatening to do Couch25k for weeks now. Now that the beach is coming, I guess I'd better get moving for real instead of just in my mind.
XXOO
LOVE this post. Makes me miss my sister and her skinny health-kick bottom. Thanks for sharing and laughing at yourself and letting us laugh with you :)
ReplyDeleteNice boobs! My gut looks similar, but I also have an umbilical hernia, so that adds to the whole ambiance. Eh, whatever. I don't understand why childbearing must add that spare tire...
ReplyDeleteYour sister looks great!
I am so with you - I am finding it heaps harder to loose weight at moment cause never had to in past - I also really need to actually attempt to loose it but it just doesn't come easy cause I have always been able to eat what I want - oh why can't I still?
ReplyDeleteYou're infertile if you're not pregnant when you want to be. You're fat if you feel uncomfortable. Simple as.
ReplyDeleteI am still "overweight" but I do not feel fat any more.
Mad.
You're a goddess. xx
hahaha you crack me up!! I absolutely love reading your blog :) Keep up the good work!!
ReplyDeleteLove this! Love that you did this!
ReplyDeleteYou are my hero!
Carrie
Great boobs. Awesome cheekbones (of the facial kind). Who cares about the rest?
ReplyDeleteLove you, love your flab -- not sure I loved this post!
ReplyDeleteI think you have lost touch with some of your fabulousity! I demand that reconnect and send posts that help me want to connect with my better self! (note: my better self doesn't have a "size", and my better self eats what she damn well pleases BECAUSE the better "stuff" is bigger than . . .)
Susanne - I completely hear what you've just said. It's coming .. they're all coming, I promise. Sometimes I need to put silly posts in here like this, to counteract all the heavier posts. Yin and Yang.
ReplyDeletePS I showed the gut picture to Mr 9 and he's like, wow. "What are the lines, mum?" And I said, "They're mums fatrolls, sweetheart."
And we came home and I ate two packets of chips and raw pancake mixture and he's looking at me, and I said "Mate, my fatrolls are hungry."
I win at parenting!
Mate, I will swap you for all your fat and you can have all of mine! You ain't fat. And man I have never noticed your boobs before, you have great boobs!
ReplyDeleteJust stumbled across your blog - and it has made my day! Your perspective of the world is so refreshing. Nothing better than having a good laugh at yourself and sailing close to the wind with political correctness.
ReplyDeleteps: I think you look fab and confident in both pics!
pps: I think my sweet brooch giveaway might be right up your alley! Stop by if you have a moment...http://checksandspots.com/check-it-out/giveaway-giveaway/
I fucking love you.
ReplyDeleteI can say fucking here, right?
Meh. I fucking love you cause you made laugh so hard I farted.
You still look fabulous. I could post (but I WON'T) my nekkid pre surgery photos that are pretty much horrifying or even some post surgery photos which are still a bit scary with all that extra hanging jiggly shit. We all have our little bits we wish we could change. Loving yourself anyways is the goal though.
ReplyDeleteI'd like to be as fat as you. And I'd like my fat to jump into my boobs. (And please never come to gym classes with me...)
ReplyDeleteYou know what the shittiest part about Google comments is? And please tell them I said so... in Wordpress, you can respond to individual comments, rather than just having to do a group reply to like six comments at once because you didn't stalk your own blog and respond every single time someone commented. Oh, you mean you can't be tethered to your blog all day to respond. AND then the original comment won't even get notified their comment was responded to unless they agreed to have EVERY FUCKING comment after theirs sent to their email. Yeah, the Google comments are craptastic. Wordpress owns their ass in the comment system.
ReplyDeleteANYWAY, I could totally have taken that exact same picture at any point in the last four months since I started working out for the exact same reason. It's better, but still not all better. And I too was a skinny bitch my whole life. Stupid getting older, stupid post baby bodies... stupid stupid stupid. I want cake! I have grown to like working out though. It's become a routine the last four months and now I feel lost on the days that I don't workout. Lost and lazy. So, that's something.
Its official. You are the best.
ReplyDeletexxx
Raw pancake mix is pretty good. Not as good as cake mix - yes there IS a difference. Everytime I start a diet to get back to my pre baby weight my brain tells me to eat more than usual. Crazy. When my dad died in January both my mum and my sister lost weight but, no, not me.
ReplyDeleteYou are so lucky to have a sister! Having one of my brothers tell me I have nice boobs or I'm a fatty would result in two things: 1) a distinctly unnerving feeling because my brother was looking at my boobs and 2) a punch in the face for calling me a fatty. LOL.
ReplyDeleteYou are the grousest. And I still gotsta get me some of that icecream xx
ReplyDeleteHAHAHHAHAAHHAHA.
ReplyDeleteI am totally a sister of yours. I want in damn it -- let me into the circle -- and Linda is totally hot -- and so are you lovely -- it'll go -- I am right there with you carrying it around with me -- I tell myself that once I get my head and heart straight my body will follow -- often times I tried the other way around and it never really works..
Keep your chin up sweetheart...and don't let the bastards get you down..;)
Love love love,
Pam
I somehow came across your blog by chance a couple of weeks ago.... It happened for a reason! I LOVE reading your blogs, I struggle with many demons, and it's refreshing and uplifting to read your words! I couldn't believe you had the balls to put up this picture!! You are AWESOME!!! and truly inspiring!!! Thank you & don't stop!
ReplyDeleteToo funny. You bought back a memory of my first job ..I was 18 & could eat garbage by the truckload & never gain a pound. All of the what I thought were OLD women (but they were actually only 40-45) would say...wait until to get to our age, it will all catch up with you....I would think yeah right fatties & stuff another pie in my mouth....thinking I will never be that person....guess who is a fatty boomsticks now.. and I swear it happened overnight! Somewhere these wise women are laughing and trying not to say we told you so fatty!
ReplyDeleteThis is the best!! Love that you posted those. And yes, good boobs. :)
ReplyDeleteAs I sit at work, wishing I could unbutton the top button of my pants, I am totally relating. I can lose weight easily enough, but I simply don't feel motivated to try at the moment. Eh, maybe later...for the moment they DO actually button, so that's something, right?
ReplyDelete~terri
You are the COOLEST PERSON IN THE WORLD!
ReplyDeleteMuch love
xxxx
I actually think you look hawt!
ReplyDeleteOkay fine, I may not be in my best mental mode ATM. Cuz it's like 12.39 in the AM. Little daughter is sleepless again. Itchy and scratchy with her eczema. Sigh.
What was I saying again? Oh yes you = hawt. The end.
Remind me to come to your site EVERY SINGLE DAY. Everytime I read something here...i die laughing. So freaking funny. I'm crying. You rock. And your rack rocks too.
ReplyDeleteYou are a much stronger woman than i...i don't even like posting pictures of me with sweatshirts on. It always means i'll be hearing from my mother in law and all of my aunts (on my husbands side) about how i should dress better and look less college-kid-like. sigh
I love this! hahahaha I do that sucky in thing with my stomach all the time...And my sister is skinnier than me! It feels like a travesty and family celebration at the same time "SIGH"
ReplyDelete