Saturday, 12 March 2011

It's a Moth, Motherfuckers.

Dave is making me a birthday coffee. Rocco is telling everybody to 'Get those candles off. Now.' .... so we could eat the cake.

The best thing about birthdays is the presents. Always has been, always will be. Except this year when my family asked what I wanted, I hung my head. "Nothing. I deserve NOTHING."

My Nothings, let me show u them. Mum bought me a pair of ugg boots. Too much?


I call it, "making winter fun." Oh and America, I have a bone to pick with you ..... Australia invented ugg boots. You can't patent the word "ugg." It's a generic word down here. You may be the boss of most things, but hands off the uggs, dudes.

Next, my sister Linda gave me a bracelet.



ONLY A BRACELET OF MULTI-COLOURED SKULLS. I just accidentally typed "multi-cultural skulls" ... perhaps they are.

Dave had asked me to "please just go pick something from somewhere hon, so I don't have to worry about it." Bless. So I did ... a light pink studded handbag from a very boutique giftshop that I never go in to because it's ... very boutique. Drunk on the power of choosing my own present, I thought I would choose something else; and looked down to find a brooch in the shape of a moth. I couldn't believe that somebody had made a moth brooch.

"Excuse me, is this a moth?"

The lady came over, so well-groomed and straight and normal and sweet-smelling. She smiled. "Yes - I think it is a moth."

"Man. That's so cool. Butterflies get all the glory."

Everybody turned and laughed at me, and I didn't really know why. I don't like being laughed at, unless I make fun of myself. I told the lady I would take the moth. And I did. I love that motherfucking moth. My sisters think it is awful, which makes me love him more.



When I got home, I opened the present from my other sister Leigh ... a huge crucifix. Like, massive. I laughed, calling her to say thank you, and how did she know I needed it for my demons? She's like, "Eden, I call a MAN-cifix." (A running joke in my family is that I need everything man-size. I would sleep straight through the night during both of my pregnancies, then do the biggest morning wee that by the time I'd finished it would be lunch. Thank you, manbladder!)

I put all of my new shiny things on, walked outside, and asked Tim to take a photo. His shoulders slumped when he saw me. He didn't ask why.


I chopped my head off .... I looked incredibly ugly. My head and I are not on speaking terms at the moment, because, you know .... it wants to kill me.)

In conclusion, I deserved nothing and got everything.

::

Writers for the Red Cross - how cool is that? Conjures up images of marching nerds with glasses on, carrying laptops. Check out how you can help with the Japanese earthquake appeal. I had the luxury of turning the news off today, because it was "too much" for me. I am a privileged spoilt white woman with no real problems except for the ones I create myself. Whilst wearing a moth brooch.

25 comments:

  1. Happy Birthday and yes - your moth is unreal. x

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  2. happy birthday dear old pisces soul. you're as deep as the ocean. xoxo

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  3. Eden, those ladies were not laughing at you. There were laughing because what you sad is true and funny and you hit a nail on the head...xx

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  4. Happy Birthday, Babe. !!!

    I really like the moth broach.

    http://spiritlodge.yuku.com/topic/1007/t/Moth-Medicine.html

    Google "moth Totem" for other descriptions.

    E, you are amazing. I wish I had more to offer you here besides XX's and OO's.

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  5. It's the 11th here in Los Angeles, so continue celebrating a bit longer! WISH BIG!

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  6. Happy Birthday!
    Your moth is the best kind of moth I have seen... because it doesn't move :)

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  7. I really like the moth :-)

    Happy Birthday lovely!

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  8. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, the skull bracelet is particularly awesome :D

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  9. Happy Birthday!! The moth is fabulous.
    Awesome blog. So glad I found you via AMB.
    Following you now with GFC.
    You can find me over at:
    http://rominagarciamartyrhood.blogspot.com/

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  10. Happy birthday! I love the moth. I love the outrageous uggies. I'm a great believer in buying your own birthday present. Last year I got a sloth necklace. It's been reminding me to slow down all year. Who else would have known that I needed a sloth?

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  11. Those are the best ugg boots I have ever seen. Hope you had a happy birthday.

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  12. Happy birthday! I love the pic with all your bd goodies!

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  13. Wait a second. I've seen you. You not ugly, woman! *slap-slap* Stop it. Hey I love that moth, it IS cool. It's beautiful, in fact. Why did they take such offense to it do you think? xox Great uggs, by the way.

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  14. Where is the pink purse? Happy birthday!

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  15. I too wanted to see the pink purse! I also agree with whoever said that the ladies weren't laughing at you, they were laughing because what you said is true. Clearly I am incapable of original thought today. ;)

    Happy Birthday! You did get some amazing things (a guy to make you birthday coffee, a boy to demand cake, sisters who know you, and some awesome presents)!

    I did not know that about the word ugg. Interesting. Also, when I was training for my job, I encountered Mothra...a moth as big as my hand (maybe bigger). It was huge and it was sitting on the back of my apartment...probably waiting for me to let the dog out so it could eat her. I don't know what kind it was.

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  16. I love it all. Happy birthday and I'm glad you are finding your words. Keri

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  17. I love it all -- ESPECIALLY THE BOOTS.

    Happy Birthday my lovely friend -- you are gorgeous -- no matter what you say -- throughout.

    XO

    P

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  18. Happy birthday! As a major fan of Silence of The Lambs, I think that moth rocks!

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  19. happy birthday :)
    the moth AND the skull bracelets are fabulous, wow, but you got other very nice presents too,
    good on you!! x

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  20. Happy birthday, Eden!! The presents ~do~ rock. And all combined together in the same picture?!?! The only thing that would have made it better was to see your face, as well. You are beautiful throughout!!

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  21. Happy Belated Birthday! Found you through atnobodytoldme and I will definitely be back! :)

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  22. Ok, I like all your presents but that skull bracelet???? THAT is the shit! I LOVE it! THAT is the best peice of jewelry! How do I get my hands on one of those?

    I hope you had the BEST birthday because dude, you totally deserve it - whether you think so or not, you do.

    xo

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  23. I love love LOVE the post and amazing gifts you received! I did know that Uggs originated in Aussie...I actually had my first pair shipped from there before they became available in the US and I still wear them although they are starting to fall a part. I hope your birthday was incredible!

    http://mytaleoftriumphandsurvival.blogspot.com/

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  24. Happy belated birthday Eden. I saw you speak at abc and loved it, actually I don't think I will ever forget it your post reading moved me so much. I've just started reading your blog and if I didn't have young children to bring up I'd sit here all day reading each and every post back to back. I think you are awesome! Thanks for sharing you on the blogosphere :).

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Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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