Friday, 5 November 2010

Putting the Fun in Fünf

Five years ago today, a popper went off .....

... signifying a union of two hardcore motherfuckers.

I love you Dave. You made me grow up. You have taught me so much over these past ten years together, mate. Remember that time we had only been together for a few weeks and we were sitting in a sauna at the local indoor pool - you told me that one day you would build me a sauna in our own house? I didn't believe you. But you did. You always do what you say you are going to do .... I wasn't used to people like that.

Remember when Max was born and we used to argue and fight so much ... we hated each other? So we did couples counselling, took Max in his teeny bassinet and he'd sit quietly in the corner, while we shouted at each other. It was infuriating to me, when I would dob on you to our therapist and he would *always* put it back on to me, telling me you weren't a mindreader. I'm pretty sure I turned to him one day and asked him, "Whose fucking side was he on, anyway?" (I was so mature, back then. Remember?)

Remember that time we went to our appointment but got the time wrong ... so ended up going to a coffeeshop together and just talking with each other? We had spent so much time analysing our relationship, we forgot to actually be in our relationship. We didn't go back to therapy, after that.

You got me, mate. My heart and soul forever. No man had ever done that before, I wouldn't let them because my heart was a jagged hunk of bleeding meat enclosed in barbed wire. One night you wanted a huge hug but I could only offer out my pinky. "That's all I can give you right now."

So you held my pinky, and drifted off to sleep.

These days, I give you my pinky, pointer, thumbs. Manhands, manfarts, stinky breath, tangled love. I give you time and space to be yourself, and you give me the same. I can't believe we went to New York together. It was an utter pleasure, watching you soak that city in. I knew you would love it. I know you so well, my survival-mode, hardcore, macho, clever hot hot guy. When your ute drives in the driveway I get so excited.

I can't believe the cancer didn't kill you. Every single day spent with you is a bonus. We are so so lucky. We build beautiful boys, together, too. You never had a dad and you are the best dad I have ever met.

Remember I dragged you to see Eat Pray Love last week, and Julia Roberts says to Javier Bardem "All of my friends say I need a man." And Javier says back, "You don't need a man ..... you need a champion."

You and I laughed so hard, because we both know you are my champion.


The fifth wedding anniversary denotes the gift of wood. Tonight, I shall give you a toothpick when you make that most annoying clicking sound with your tongue after dinner, trying to get the food out.

Because you will. Oh yes, you will.

Almost eleven years together ... five years since I stuffed up our carefully planned bridal waltz. Remember I kept trying to lead you?

And I always will.



  1. OMG is that a donut tower?

    ....and wishing you a lifetime more of 5 year anniversaries~

  2. Awwww! Aren't you two beautiful? Congratulations and Happy Anniversary!

  3. Happy Anniversary!! THE SUIT. We wanna see THE SUIT.


  4. I love this post!

    Happy Anniversary to you and your hubby x

  5. Happy Anniversary! Beautiful post :)

  6. Happy Anniversary! Mine is today too, but it's Thursday the 4th here! It's our 15th!

  7. Happy Anniversary! What a beautiful post.

  8. Happy Anniversary!!! You look so beautiful in your dress!

  9. I am SO doing a portrait session with you guys for an anniversary present!

  10. What a gorgeous post and an even more gorgeous couple. You two rock! Happy Anniversary guys...cheers to many, many more xx

  11. That was beautiful! Warmest wishes!

  12. You two look beautiful!

    Happy Anniversary!!


  13. Beautiful post! Happy Happy Anniversary to you two!! MWAH! xoxoxo

  14. Thank you for sharing these photos! And yeah, donuts = awesome. Congratulations on five years hitched!

  15. Happy Anniversary!!
    What a great post! I teared up AND laughed, you can't get better than that. May you have many more years together!

  16. Happy anniversary!! I love the pics and the looks in both of your faces. May you wear those smiles for many, many years to come!

  17. This WHOLE post made me teary -- but especially the part about seeing Dave as a dad.

    I so get it.

    I am just so happy for you both, and your children -- because in the end? They are the luckiest ones...



  18. You made me happy cry :) Happy anniversary to your entire family!

    My husband and I have only been married for a couple months. I didn't go into this an idealist, thinking everything is always going to be perfect. I know there will be bullshit. I loved reading your story because it acknowledges the bullshit but focuses more on how you two came out on the other side of it. Thanks for sharing!

  19. happy anniversary you two crazy kids!
    p.s i think Dave is going to love that it's a "wooden" anniversary.. wink wink

  20. Well,Mine is today too, but it's Thursday the 4th here! It's our 15th!

  21. That is a message of true love. It's not about puppies and kittens and rainbows and unicorns. It's about 2 people learning to live together. It's no easy task, my friend. I must tell you. You have one awesome man.

    That pinky comment? That was the clincher for me. How appropos that you were a pinky in your lovely bridal ensemble. I picked a good day to stop by.

  22. Happy Anniversary, this was beautiful as are the both of you. And the pictures were gratuitous and intriguing for me, a stranger.

    Thanks for your comment on my blog today, you know how to bully the bullies.


  23. How absolutely gorgeous.I love how you say that you spent so much time analysing your relationship rather than being in it. Great food for thought for me today Eden.

  24. What a sweet post. Love the pics - you were a beautiful bride (no surprise there). Happy anniversary!

  25. Happy Anniversary you crazy kids!


Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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