Thursday, 8 July 2010

How to live.

- Photo taken by me in a cluttered antique shop on Parramatta Road, Sydney March 2010

Be bold. Be courageous, generous, thoughtful. Think deeply. Manners are free - say please and thank you a lot. Unparent yourself. You have more freedom than you will ever know. When you feel fat and ugly and unloved, know this: you will look back at photos of you and realise you were beautiful all along. True!

Don't live in anybody else's shadow. Live in your own shadow. Make friends with your shadow ... you can't outrun it. Wherever you go, there you are! When you are judgemental of someone, gently remember that you are actually judging yourself. Be kind to yourself. Forgive yourself.

You are ok! That is the basis of a very wise rehabilitation program used for recovering drug addicts and alcoholics - throughout all the muck and mire and garbage, all we ever really want to know is that we are ok. You are ok!

Breathe. Stop living in your head. Grow up. Then grow back down again.

Look at old people more. Imagine all they have been through, all they have seen. They're fascinating. (Especially the really grouchy ones.)

You are stronger than you will ever know. Stop judging your insides by other people's outsides. You are where somebody else once was. Evolve. Notice your evolution, feed it. Watch it grow.

You are never too old. It's never too late. Things are never that bad. Realz. I thought all of that and have travelled back in time to tell you the tale.

Did you have great parents? What a blessing. Dud parents? Forgive them. If you can't do that, try to understand them. If you can't do that, wish them peace. It's hard.

So many things in life are hard. The best and most worthwhile things in life are the hardest of all.

Take a walk every day for at least twenty minutes. Your hips will thank you when you're sixty.

Imagine punching the whole world in the face, every once in a while. Feels good doesn't it? Rebel. Be free. Don't believe in The Government .... there is no "The Government." Believe in the good and the light in others. All of the darkness in the whole world cannot put out the light of one candle. Remember when you were a kid watching cartoons and the goodies always won? The baddies never win.

Be a badass goodie.

Hate is not the opposite of love - fear is the opposite of love.

You are not less than anybody else. You are not less than anybody else.

Don't worry if you think you have married the wrong person. Everybody marries the wrong person. Try to live together and move forward anyway. Keep going, and growing.

Never ever ever ever ever give up. Don't kill yourself - you'll miss the ending.

Have compassion and time for people who do not know as much as you yet, the same way others had compassion and time for you at the beginning of your journey. Stay away from the haters, the crazymakers, the users. Nourish your body with whole foods. Feed your brain as well as your mind.

Write letters. Learn the tango, even if you're single. Especially if you're single.

You are forgiven. You are ok.

All is well.

Especially when it's not.


When you master how to do all this, please give me a call on 1-800-FLOUNDER. Because most days I have no flaming idea what I'm doing.


  1. It certainly seems like you have the proper framework!

  2. I love you my friend.

    Winter will not last forever -- but sometimes it seems as if it will -- remember when you sent me summer sunshine? Well here it is coming right back to you...tilt your head back and feel the sun on your face.

    Love love love,


  3. you should totally write greeting cards.

    but probably make your inspirational words a tad shorter;)

    honestly, i thought this was frigging awesome...and it takes a lot to make me able to read through a whole post.



  4. I will have to read this agaib. Bit by bit because there is so much here.

  5. Thank you, I needed this!

    You forgot to mention anything about chocolate, a bit of chocolate a day keeps the crazies away?


  6. Just checking - any chance you got into my head today to determine this is exactly what I needed to read?

    You are a welcome trespasser.

    Thank jaw for the small favors thrown our way when I found your blog.

  7. I love this and you. When I see you in August I will probably kiss you on the mouth because of this post.

  8. Beautiful, fabulous and amazing post. I love it.

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  10. I needed to read this today, YOU HAVE NO IDEA! thank you so much.

  11. This is incredible, and had me in tears before I even got to the video - that song ALWAYS does me in. As soon as I saw there was a video attached to this post I knew that would be the one.
    I am printing this out and sticking it on my fridge. No shit, I need to read this every day.

    You're ok Eden. We're all ok.

  12. This is awesome and what a great date too ;)
    It is as if you were speaking to me.

  13. Thanks for reading this at #ausblogcon2011 ... was one of my highlights of the day. It resonated with me big time x

  14. Belinda confirmed what I suspected from a tweet I read this weekend - I recognised the line about trying to understand your parents if you can't forgive them!

    This is fantastic! Love it!

  15. I love reading this and love that I can hear your voice as I read it now. Thanks, gorgeous lady. xx

  16. I love this post. Can I share this link on my Facebook and my blog?

  17. I love this. Especially the end cause I forget this I know as well. Congrats on your one month and the courage to be honest! Bloody sucks to go through it but it can now be part of your recovery. I am learning humility lately too. Gaining a new perspective can be "unbelievably painful" so I am sending warm fuzzies your way. xo, JoC

  18. cool post :-) theres some good advice in there, especially 'punching the world in the face' hahaha love it.

    ooh, and I love 'clutter shops' good term for it, never heard that one before!

    following you now, look forward to what you got next ;-)

    - tork
    Adelaide and South Australia blog

  19. Super ! Just the things I wanted to read ! The antique shop pic is great . Must read more of your posts .

  20. :::::crying:::::
    Wow. You have no idea how much I needed this.
    Words fail

  21. What a wonderful post! You down-under girls are amazing. I followed Mary's link to your blog and am looking forward to reading more. I know it will be fantastic.

    Thank you for the above inspiration. I really needed it today, a rainy day in a hostile NYC office (ugh). I thought to myself this morning "you have reached the end of the rope, now it is just deciding when to drop". Maybe before I do I will be a badass goodie. That would really freak them out. Love it!

  22. Just re visiting these wise words. You were awesome yesterday. You will rock Blogher.


Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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