Wednesday, 26 August 2009

The Long and Winding Sippy Bip of Life

On the weekend I went for a long run on the beach. Not sure if I was running towards, or away from myself ... but either way it felt good. Winter pretended it was gone for a while, but it's back again now, to give us one long icy blast as it says goodbye.

Then spring will come. I notice seasons more and more every year .... it's amazing how all the green buds have been hiding in the bare sticks all along! Trickers! Can't believe that I'm 37 and only just realised this for the first time.

Also on the weekend, Dave and I fought like a pair of wild alley cats. It was mainly my fault .... poor Dave. Two days of stupid, pointless arguing around the same old circles. I wondered how other people fight. Surely not as messy as us? A lady walked past me in the shopping centre mid-fight with her husband, and I just felt so much better. We are not the only ones fucked up, I thought.

We each spiralled and fell down, separately. We were at his mums, where it's very difficult to ever have a good time anyway .. but on the last day, she confided in me about something so big and scary for her that I was humbled and ashamed of myself. Told her we may have had our differences over the years but I was there if she ever needed.

Dave having a quiet lie down at Nana's -

I forced Dave to come with me to the movies, we NEVER get the chance together anymore. I knew it would shake us out of our reality and it did - Inglourious Basterds was dark, violent, and twisted. Exactly like Dave and I. We fucking loved it, got back in at 12.30am and made sexy love time.

We drove home and I made a baked dinner to welcome my brother back from overseas. Tim's friend stayed over too ... six guys and me, sitting together around the dinner table. I wondered why I was the only girl in this house, and what that teaches me. Tim and Max were arguing over who had done a fart. "You done that fart" ... "No, YOU done that fart!!" I said, "GUYS!" And they both waited to get into trouble. "It's who DID that fart, not done."


In the paper yesterday I read that half of people who get diagnosed with cancer are dead within five years. It freaked me out ... especially since Dave had to see his oncologist today. He got a blood test, had a chat. We've been concerned ("concerned" meaning TERRIFIED) about his recent bouts of reflux and indigestion. I was thinking it could be all of his tumours back again, badder than before ... the doctor advised Dave to stop drinking coffee for a while, which really makes sense, considering he drinks four double-shots a day. FOUR.


I went to Max's reading circle at his school yesterday, for Book Week. I bought him a brand new Enchanted Woods book, which was my all-time favourite series as a kid. Max was happy, but pulls out his Simpsons comic. "Ummm, can we actually read this, mum?" We lay together on the pebblecrete, sharing a cushion, holding the magazine up to block the sun from our eyes. The other children were reading Roald Dahl, Green Eggs and Ham, and Mr Men books to their parents.

I lay there with my son and we both pissed ourselves laughing at Monty Burns bossing Smithers around.


Last Sunday, Dave stood at the local fair, watching Max slide down the huge slide. Max loves slippery dips, one of his first words was "sippy bip." He kept saying "Come on, dad! COME ON!" But he didn't feel like it and kept saying no. I walked over and bought them both a ticket, saying well, you have to go now. He took his morose butt over, grabbed a sack, wearily climbed the stairs. They went whooshing down together.

Dave came over to me munching my corn on a stick, waiting by the pram, Rocco asleep and the strains of "I was working as a waitress in a cocktail ba-ar .. when I met you."

Dave had a half-smile, we were still re-connecting. I said, "See? You just needed a big slide. All better now?"

As if one slide could take away all the pain and fear of last year and all the damage it caused. I looked him in the eyes, the same crinkly, wonderful eyes I've been looking in for the past ten years.

And we laughed and laughed.


  1. Great post. Fart grammar - very nice. My beloved lives miles away in Port Glasgow and we only see each other once a week. We have never had anything but tiny arguments which have been framed with humour. He is planning to move here in the New Year however and promises we'll have fights when we live together. Part of him is looking forward to it. I think perhaps it's the idea of making up, followed by "sexy love time."


    Sounds like a great time! Even with the fighting. How can you truly love someone so deeply and not fight? Dirty (my new name for my husband) and I have had some knock down drag out fights! But making up is truly the best part. Not just the sex, but the appreciation for the other and their differences.

  3. I'm here, and I'm glad you are too. Will have to go see Inglourious Basterds now. Hope Dave's Mum is ok.


  4. My husband and I do some serious arguing. That's what comes when you bring two extremely hardheaded know-it-alls together...someone always has to be right. And he just keeps on thinking he is.

    I'm glad you're reconnecting though. As long as you can keep doing that, everything will be OK.

    I'm also glad you have your priorities straight - the "done" was killing me. Grammar is very important when you're insulting someone!

  5. I just love you. But you knew that.

  6. My husband and I hate in the same capacity that we love. VERY THIN LINE.

  7. Spring. The Simpsons.

    Make everything just a little better.

  8. We loved Inglourious Basterds, too. There's just something about all the blood and dark humor that makes me smile.

    I hope Dave can kick his double-shots and get to feeling better. His mom too, I hope it's nothing too serious.

  9. So glad spring is on its way to you. It sounds like it is already there in your heart - that image of you and Dave, laughing at the fair after the slide is just so full of truth and love and life.

    Keeping you in my thoughts always, my maple-flavoured friend.

  10. It always seems so odd that your seasons are opposite ours. Fall and winter are coming here and your looking forward to spring.
    Glad you've had a good time even with the fighting.
    Hugs to you.

  11. Oh how I love you. Your posts make me realize that I'm not alone in my craziness. I wish you could hear half the shit Britt and I say when arguing. You'd definitely feel a bit better.
    And I love love LOVE that you corrected their grammar instead of their actions!

  12. Spring is sprung
    The grass is riz
    Who done the fart
    Now thats the biz!

    Hubby and I don't fight. Not ever. Wierd huh? But my ex and I, we fought all the time. I like my peace now, but I also know if something came up that was worth fighting about, I would SO win!

    Keep reconnecting. You guys have had a tough year. Love ya!

  13. I drink at least that much coffee. :)


  14. "and we laughed and laughed" made me get a lump in my throat.

    Who doesn't need a big slide every now and then?

    I love you dearly.


  15. That's a great sum-up post. Genuinely good. Jesus, you know, comparitively speaking, I'm way way way more schnarky than you. You can still see all the good in things. Which is a good thing, of course, I'm just a snot.


    i love you. :)

  16. Typing on a crackberry at the beach, so posting my comments to you psychically ;) ... Just like all of my psychic blog posts lately. Can you hear the silent screams? The black laughter? Feel the love?

    Peace, E. More later. Wish youse were here.


  17. I just KNEW you were going to correct their grammar! That would have been my issue too!! HAHAHA!

    Hugs to you Barry!!


  18. I never used to notice the seasons changing and the little things that go along with those changes. But then I never used to notice anything at all outside of a few basic 'necessities'.

    Now, between having a son and some other life changes, I notice everything. It's fantastic. It's like having a new pair of glasses...

  19. One big slide is often all that it takes. So funny that we are still just big kids.

    We argue stupid pointless arguments in circles. It reassures me reading that other couples do too, and that they still have a good relationship.

    Totally agree with you on the fart grammer.

    I am going to see with the man if we can go and see Inglorious Bastards. I've been wanting to see it but after your description, I know it's just what we need.

    Here's to the next 20 years. May there be many many movies and big fat slides with Dave.


Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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