Sunday, 10 May 2009

My Mothers Day Really Sucked and I LOVED it.

(This pic was taken eleven hours ago, during our sunchasing sojourn).
Had the WORST time. It rained, my calf muscle is sore, I am really sick again. I've been sick for a month now - tonsillitis is back, terrible headaches - I honestly wondered if I should get checked for swine flu. Max got a vomiting bug, he spewed all over his bed and his floor. After he heaved for the third time, we locked eyes and just looked at each other. What in Gods name are you supposed to do with steaming chicken casserole vomit? Piles of it? I led him into the bathroom, sat him down, and went to clean the mess. Except, I'm not really a "proper" mother when it comes to shit like that. I started wiping it, but that led to me heaving and gagging, which scared him. So I threw a towel on it and tried to scoop it all up. "Pretend it's the babys poo. Pretend it's poo." But I couldn't trick myself - there were chunks, man. That shit is WRONG.

I threw the towel in the bin afterwards. There's probably some rulebook on how to scrape and wash spewy towels but, whatever.

So then Dave gets sick, Tim gets sick, and then Rocco Baby gets it too. The family that gets sick together, goes on five hour car trips together. This is how we roll.

Tim and I had a HUGE blowup, which was all just me being a bitch. I apologised to him profusely. Rocco banged his teeth so hard they all bled - I didn't even bat an eye. I'm getting used to it now, just held the tissue while the blood pissed out, wiped it all off, and sent him on his merry way.

Dave sent Max to get the mothers day card out of the car, Max locked the keys in the car. Tim spent the next three hours jimmying open the sunroof with a knife, and sticking a wire coat hanger down in there, trying to press the "unlock" button. He was in his element - "Eden, it's like ... the ultimate skilltester."

Unfortunately, his device didn't work, we were in a secluded town, Dave had to smash a window to retrieve the keys. And grumbled for the next day that it was the "most expensive mothers day card ever made."

We went out for dinner to Lone Star, Dave and Tim had a TOOTHPICK fight in the carpark while I stood there, incredulously watching my boys all STAB each other. With toothpicks.

Because that is how we roll.

I had a pretty shit time. It was magnificent. I am so so so blessed to be able to have a shit time. Last year, I was looking forward to mothers day so much. I was seventeen years pregnant, and woke up to my husband limping around the kitchen table, setting it for pancakes. He was in agony, but was waiting til he made pancakes and then was going to the ER at our local hospital. I sent him there straight away, they sent him back straight away with a diagnosis of a bowel infection. Phew! Bowel infection! Lucky we got to the bottom of THAT. But we both knew something was wrong. It was an uneasy mothers day. We hired out Quentins Tarentino's "Deathproof" (HA!) and I sat in a bean bag at his feet, (Dave's, not Quentin's) ... looking over at him with an awful feeling of dread. A friend popped in but we sent her away, not knowing why ... we needed to be by ourselves. The baby moved in my belly but other undercurrents started swirling, and I never got my pancakes.

I didn't get pancakes this year either. But I have him, standing tall and strong and proud. Jamming toothpicks into his sons arm in a Penrith carpark of Lone Star because this is how we roll.

I wish I knew, last mothers day. If only I knew that in a years time, we would be sitting next to each other on a beach bench, looking at the ocean. I could have handled the past year so, so much better. With more grace. And hope.

But I didn't know, because nobody knows, and I handled it sometimes ok, mostly messily, and always with a big fat slice of dark fear in my heart.
This is how life rolls.

The boys at Lone Star ... having a competition to see who could float Max's Mr Men figurines on the helium mothers day balloons -

Me with two of my four guys. I look tiiiiired .... the Lone Star waitresses kept walking past, picking up all the stray rib bones, toys and spoons that a VERY cranky Rocco kept throwing onto the floor. After my twelfth apologetic thankyou, I was like, you know what? I'm not saying thank you any more -

Then I made Dave drive to Krispy Kreme and we got a big fat box'o'lard. YUM. I've eaten so many that it feels like I probably can actually roll.


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  2. Don't you love being normal?! Today, Mothers Day, I have done 4 loads of laundry, (one for each older child who rolled home for the weekend and two loads for the friend that S2 brought with him), cleaned up dog vomit, did manage a shower and now it is almost 1:00 in the afternoon and I just heard the familiar grunt of awakening teenaged boys asking whats for breakfast. Yeah, Happy fucking day to me :)

  3. Awww how sweet! I love the pictures. I wish you peace and I'm sending you hugs. Love ya girlie!

  4. I hope you guys all feel better soon!
    Happy Mothers Day Eden. I wish you were my mom!

  5. LOL. I don't think you have a future as a nurse. I once had a patient vomit all over my shoes. I laughed while rinsing it off in the bathroom.

    I have a car that cannot be locked on the driver's side unless the keys are in the ignition, or it's locked from the outside. I've locked myself out a million times, and cannot be trusted.

    What a pooey Mother's Day- but at least you can laugh!

  6. Aww. Mine sucked and I looked up the history and decided I'd ignore a made-up celebration next year :)



  7. At least you had a memorable mothers day that you will laugh about in years to come right? I love the pics. It all sounds so much better than last years. Hope all the sickness stuff is gone.
    And oh how I miss Krispy Kreme. I think the closest is 3 hours away and no matter how I try to reason it I can't justify driving that far for a donut or 12.

  8. We had that spewing sickness earlier in the week - every one of us. I was going to say that I've never cleaned up that much sick, but then I remembered that I used to be sick (in a self-inflicted manner) pretty much all the time. Off on a tangent.

    At any rate, Happy belated Mother's Day. Glad that you got what you needed despite it all.

  9. Now that's a Mother's Day! As I was rinsing vomit chunks down the drain during our last episode, I was thinking...This is going to clog the pipes. I should have put it down the disposal. That's how I keep my mind off the fact that half-digested food may have just touched my hand.

    I can't believe that Krispy Kreme has invaded that far away. To think that's one of the few things the US exports - bad ideas in food.

  10. Eeewww I can't stand the vomit stories!
    I love your family, how boring if they were normal.
    Happy belated Mothers Day !

  11. E!!

    - Love the new picture postage stamp at the top. I want a copy for my fridge. :) You're a star baby, and don't forget it. ;)

    - We had two strep cases (one "Scarlet Fever style" for variety) and one ear infection this weekend for Mother's day. We grabbed the antibiotics and still went out of town, more or less as planned. Another Vilking parent first ... car sickness. And of course DH claimed the backseat was too tight space-wise for him to do a thorough clean-up. At least he tried.

    - Ya got me with this:

    "I wish I knew, last mothers day. If only I knew that in a years time, we would be sitting next to each other on a beach bench, looking at the ocean. I could have handled the past year so, so much better. With more grace. And hope."

    I wish we knew, too. I think that a lot. I thank my stars every day for bullets dodged ... and a few other things.

    - Thanks for the love and the warm weather this morning. Damn that was nice. I promise I'll take good care of Summer and send it back to you before you go completely mad. And you can always come and visit it.



  12. haha- your mothers day STILL sounds better than mine dear.

    I love that you were all together.
    I also love that last picture of you and your boys.

    so when can I come over and chill?

  13. Eden, I so adore you. "Pretend it's the baby's poo." I will have to remember that. Of all my anxieties about being a mother, the fear of dealing with spewing is at the top of the list. Although I have dealt with my nephew's spew twice and managed to survive without spewing myself both times. Shudder, though.

    And my darling girl - you handled last year PERFECTLY. You slogged through the shit and the spew and the dark, dark fear and you did what you had to do to make it to this Mother's Day on the beach. The way you did it IS grace, to me. Maybe because I tend to think that grace and faith and love are all a hell of a lot messier than we like to think they are, and the way I tend to think they are has a fuck of a lot in common with denial. The fact that you got down in the dirt and wrestled, and continue to wrestle, with the fear and dread and anger and loss - there are few things more beautiful to me than knowing that you did it and yet here you are, full of donuts and writing about toothpick fights.

    Hope at least some of that made sense.

    I'm so glad your Mother's Day sucked and that you loved it. Somehow that is so perfectly you.

  14. I'm glad you had such a good Mother's day! :) Love the pictures and I like the new picture of you in the cowboy hat!


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