Monday, 23 March 2009

Perfect Moment Monday


My perfect moment was definitely not when a COCKROACH crawled under my towel in the middle of pump class today. Nor was it when the baby woke at 2am, 3.30am, and finally again at 5am SCREAMING his head off ... I put a pillow over my head and used Jedi mind control to will Dave to get up which he finally did, but it took so looooooong that I almost imploded.

My perfect moment was totally not when I searched high and low for my mobile phone, which is still missing. I started to cry - not about the actual phone, but the priceless pics and video footage I took of Rocco when he was tiny. Nobody else really took any other pics of him, thrust so cruelly we were into Daves Cancerland Hell.

I need to find my phone.

My perfect moment was most certainly not when I slammed the door on Dave for pissing me off, or when it rained after I washed my car.

And when my most glorious seven year old tearfully told me that "Nobody talks to him during dinner," and I realised that we are all so loud and obnoxious and he just sits there soaking it all in. Much like myself as a child. The pain with which he told me that was the furthest from a perfect moment you could imagine.

And googling "heartburn non-hodgkins relapse?" .... was not perfect. It was terrifying. Dave sees his oncologist in April for a checkup. Much as I like to proudly sprout I refuse to live in cancer's shadow ... well, some days I pitch a freakin' tent in the shadow and crack open a soda pop. (I said soda pop for you Americans HAHA. We call it fizzy drink.)

I've had a fucked day. Can you tell?

__

For weeks, I've wanted to do Lori's Perfect Moment Monday. I've always had so many to choose from ... and Lori is just such a warm and beautiful gal. I emailed her once that if Dave ever met her, he would call her "Lozza". She told me that a New Zealand boyfriend used to call her Lozza, and I totally felt more of a kinship with her because New Zealand is almost Australia. (Right, Pix!?)

Earlier I sat on my bed, using all my Spidey Senses to "feel" where my phone is. Useless. I then tried to think of a perfect moment on this Monday, and all I could think was all the bad shit that happened. And then, I realised there were heaps of perfect moments. My brain just latches on to the bad shit automatically.

My many perfect moments:

1) Rocco being fawned over by a million people in the street, told how handsome he is.

2) Dave and I FORGETTING the name of his oncologist. Both of us could not remember the guys name to save our life.
3) Tim playing with Maxie on the trampoline for ages, in the pouring rain.

4) Dave holding Rocco out in the pouring rain, making up a funny song: "Have you ever ... felt rain before?" And kissing him seventy times.

5) Dave walking straight up to me after he hopped out of his ute, to kiss ME. Even though I slammed the door on him and was so very mean.

6) Me realising that if my phone is lost, all we have is right here right now. I can smell Rocco and touch him and look at him. It doesn't matter about the pics. (But then I secretly thought I was putting on an acceptance show for Universe and as soon as I had "accepted" the lost phone I will find it *ahem*)

7) The cockroach in pump class turned out to be a grasshopper.

Today, I totally got what Lori is asking for .... there are perfect moments all around us. Sometimes we just need to adjust our focus.

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