Friday, 6 February 2009

Is It National Piss Eden Off Day?

I'm so cranky right now, I know I should cool down for a bit before writing.

But I won't.


Hi, Eden here. A.k.a. The freakshow! Yes, it is true ...... that is how I met my husband! And, also ... all the parts about him are true too!! OMG!! And ... ME TOO!!

You can all kiss my arse. I have no time for people like you. Some women think the instant they become mothers, they must cut their hair short and wear frumpy clothes, be all mumsy and boring. And bitch about other people behind their back - say, when their husbands are undergoing chemotherapy and OMG did you HEAR!!

Someone told me today what some "rumours" have been, so I called another mum from school and she confirmed it and told me more.

Like, my whole life history was broadcast over the loudspeaker at assembly when I wasn't there. At first I was mortified, then ashamed. Now I honestly don't care. I have nothing to hide from, oh gossip mongers. I have a very good idea where it all came from, too. But I don't know for sure, lucky for you! (Can you imagine if I ever find out for sure!)


I used to have a blog, under an assumed name. I started it because I went through IVF to fall pregnant with my gorgeous baby. Some women find it hard to get pregnant .... some woman can't. I discovered the world of infertility blogs, written by women all across the world. I fell in love with them all, started to document my own IVF/pregnancy journey. In a happy-go-lucky way.

I always knew, through my own pregnancy, that something bad was going to happen. (Just ask my sisters, they were SO over me worrying, heh.) I thought the bad thing would be something to do with the birth/baby, didn't realise the bad thing was multiplying in my husbands body cavity.

My assumed-name blog got very serious, very quickly. I got some of the best, most honest, raw, AMAZING support in the Universe. I got heard, cheered on, supported, listened to. My rants were sometimes full of rage and venom, or love and hope ..... sometimes I would write in graphic detail, the shady parts of my past.

The shady parts of my past ...... of which there are many!!

People IRL (In Real Life) ... started to find my blog, which made me uncomfortable. It is now set to private .... there are around sixty women in the world who can read it. I still post there occasionally. I started this blog, under my real name. I enjoy blogging, it helps me write better. But mostly, I feel the love from people who do not judge, who share their stories, and their pain, and their heartbreaks.

Two days ago, I stood outside the gym, reading all the comments to my last two posts. Alternately crying, and laughing ...... I marvelled at the Wise Sages. I wish I could marry my comment section - I am so privileged to get feedback when I write. Blogging is a writers wet dream.

The women in my comment section would never talk out the side of their mouths at school ... "Look, that's the one. Did you HEAR!?" Never.

The women in my comment section most CERTAINLY don't live small, suffocating lives in a small town - and if they DID, they would be honest about it and laugh at themselves.

The women in my comment section have been through more pain than you could dream of. And they still don't give up.

Yes I have lived a life that sometimes even I am amazed at. When I am with my sisters, they egg me on -

"Go on, tell us another story!"

And I do, and we all fall about in mortified laughter.

I will touch on some things in this blog, but never fully, because I don't want that reflected back onto my children.

BUT: I have nothing to be ashamed at. Talk away - follow me with your eyes when I'm pushing the pram to pick up my son. I don't care. I have felt things you never will, touched the sky and made it safely back to orbit. Have you?

I bet you wish you have.

Sucks to be you.


  1. Screw them Eden ! Let them gossip as much as they like, you are so much better than that.

    I think you need to move out of the small town and down to Sydney where nobody knows you name and don't give a rats ass ;)

  2. DAMN THEM! They are just insecure and suck! I'm sorry, that they are being so petty to you. I'm going to come down and kick em for ya, k?

  3. You are being featured on Five Star Friday!

  4. Oh, Eden. I am so sorry that people can't mind their own business and grow up! How dare them talk about someone else like that! They do suck because they are so judgemental.

    I wish I could take the pain away that they have caused you.

    You are so very right--there is nothing for you to be ashamed of! You are a wonderful, talented, loving woman. If these other women don't see that (and only the most idiotic people could ever miss your beauty both inside and out) then you are better off without them.

    They do not hold the power, Eden, you do!

    Much love as always.

    P.S. Congrats on the feature of your post! I voted for you on Kristi, too! :-)

  5. A very wise and beautiful woman I am privileged to know (oh, hang on - it was you!) had a quote on her other blog...

    “How vain it is to sit down to write...
    ... when you have not stood up to live."

    I immediately though of it when I read this post. These petty gossip mongers are just jealous that you went out and lived life when they are still too scared to.

  6. Hey Eden...c'mon give me their names. I am old and feeble but I still pack a mean right hook.

    I'll gladly punch someone for you.

    This post describes why I have a limited circle of friends...the ones I trust and who, like me, don't pull the gossip shit.

    I am SOOO over the chatty, catty BS that so many women need in their lives to feel useful. How sad they are.

  7. Hi, I am coming out of delurk mode to say that I think you are an amazing person. (I followed you over from your other blog which I found linked to through an infertility blog, don't remember which one.)

    The others commenters are right. Screw the small-minded people who are too insecure in themselves to understand that there is more than one valid way of doing anything, including being a mom, wife, etc. They are missing out on a lot of life by being the way they are and judging anyone who is not like them. And they are missing out on you, which is a shame because you are great. Too bad for them. Screw em, they aren't worth your time or the bandwith.

    I would almost guarantee they are jealous of you and what you have accomplished. You are so much better than all of them, believe it, because those of us who read your blog know it. Okay, going back into lurker mode now. I admire you so much.


  8. Good for you. There will always be those who get their happiness in life by enjoying someone elses pain.
    You have nothing to be ashamed of. Nothing! They do, for being such shitty people.

  9. You gotta love the Women that have it all perfectly figured out, right.

  10. Oh my dear,

    Got tears in my eyes about the part -- women in your comment section...(cheering section)...

    Don't you marvel sometimes at the strength of your heart? You're expansive because life, in its horror, has made you so -- and though those small minded women don't realize it -- it's a great gift -- because you take it all in, even them, and see what the world is capable of -- its beauty, its darkness --

    You've been touched -- in they have not -- and so?

    Fuck em.

    That's what I say...ladylike aren't I?

    I love you Eden. You'll be my friend forever.



  11. Idiots! All of them!

    Damn right you have nothing to be ashamed of. You are a winner in ways they can never imagine! xoxo

  12. Screw them, they are obviously have a very boring life and nothing better to do.

  13. Oh, Eden, I have endured gossip in my day too! I live in the same small town where I grew up....I love living here. I'm pretty sure you're going to find gossips wherever you live.....Here is a scripture you can give to them.

    Proverbs 13:3

    Whoever guards his mouth preserves his life; he (or her, or they) who opens wide his lips comes to ruin.

  14. Gah, women! This is why I stick to my few select women friends and just say 'hello' and walk on by the others at my kids' school.

    These sad, small-minded ladies (and I use the term loosely) have nothing going on in their own lives worth talking about so they invent drama at someone else's expense. I don't have time for it and it sounds like you don't screw them.

    Kill 'em with kindness--smile politely, say 'hello' and live life well. For that type of woman, living well is the best revenge. They just can't stand to see someone else happy--all the more reason to embrace your life, its ups and downs and everything it entails--it's what made you YOU. And if they don't like that person, fuck 'em; you sure as hell don't need those judgemental bitches.

  15. Oh screw them!!!

    Small petty women, who bash others to make themselves feel better.
    We have all met women like this. They suck.

    The same women who push their children to compete with other children to make themselves look good. You know, the competitive Mommy's who always want to "one up" you? Yuck.

    I would rather have my dirty house, snot dripping boringly average child, sweatpants wearing, REAL LIFE thank you very much!

    Can you imagine how exhausting it must be to be so fake, and to be so concerned with everyone else's private business? sounds wretched.

    They sould be pitied really.

    I just want to smooch you directly on the mouth, but I don't swing that way. I might make an exception for you though, you firey redhead!

  16. Oh screw them!!!

    Small petty women, who bash others to make themselves feel better.
    We have all met women like this. They suck.

    The same women who push their children to compete with other children to make themselves look good. You know, the competitive Mommy's who always want to "one up" you? Yuck.

    I would rather have my dirty house, snot dripping boringly average child, sweatpants wearing, REAL LIFE thank you very much!

    Can you imagine how exhausting it must be to be so fake, and to be so concerned with everyone else's private business? sounds wretched.

    They sould be pitied really.

    I just want to smooch you directly on the mouth, but I don't swing that way. I might make an exception for you though, you firey redhead!

  17. ps - sorry for the double post...wonky computers!

  18. Well, shit, E. So that was TODAY? TODAY was Piss Eden Off day?! Dammit! Now with the time diff, I've missed my chance and ~what~? I have to wait ~another~ whole year? Don't worry, I'll put a note in my planner ....

    Seriously, you have these women in Australia, too? It's enough to make a girl take up the dark arts. Think about it for a minute. We would have quite a coven here ...

    Ever read The Witches Of Eastwick by Updike? It's fun. He died last week. He knew all about the little people.



  19. That is IT! I am getting a plane ticket and coming to Australia RIGHT NOW for some serious ARSE WHOOPING. The loudspeaker?! Who ARE these people?! Have they EVER had an original thought?

    Damn skippy you have touched the sky. You are my own personal Neil Armstrong and I think you are one of the most inspiring people I've ever met. (I refuse to met in quotes because our souls have met.) Those women have no idea how small their lives are. Sucks to be them indeed. Maybe one day their worlds will expand and they'll look back to this moment and realize just what went down...and what they missed when they missed a friendship with you.

    Keep on being hawesome (hot and awesome). You rock hard my gorgeous friend.


  20. When I run into people like that I simply HAVE to really give them something to talk about. I HAVE to become obnoxious (well, more so that normal). I can't help myself. Whatever they are judging about me I do it in spades! Just cuz it fun.

  21. God...busybody old women with nothing better to do. Rise above it. Be proud of who you are and how far you have come. And remember...we all love you!

  22. No matter where you go there will always be some person trying to make their lives look better by making someone else look worse.

    Hold your head up high!
    Also be glad you don't have their hair and their big ass's!

  23. That's probably why my husband is always after me to not divulge any personal information...he's a small town boy, and I'm a city girl. I haven't had to experience this phenomenon since, um, HIGH SCHOOL.

    Continue to be yourself. If others can't deal, that's their problem.

    I'm working hard on being non-judgemental... yesterday, when another mom was talking about having a Dr. Pepper and Captain Morgan (rum, in case they don't sell that in Australia) at 3 in the afternoon, but only one because she had to pick her kids up, my thought was "Don't you have to work? Because there's no way I could get a drink on my 3:00 break."

    Anyway, if people are talking about you, it's only because you're interesting, and they're not. Fuck 'em

  24. You already know this, mate, but FUCK 'EM!!!!!

    I am always here, singing my "shoop shoop" and "oh, YEAH" and "doo wop" - all while wearing a sweet black dress and doing a funky dance with my fellow back-up singers. Oh yeah, and giving the finger to those petty bitches in your town.

    If I was there, I would walk with you to school and give those wenches the frowning of a lifetime, too.

    And congrats on Five Star Friday!

  25. Eden... I missed the password and log in name to your old blog. I loved reading it and miss it! Can I come back to play???


  26. Those peeps can go suck on a jellyfish! I think you are great and so do tons of other women here. You have been so strong for so long. How dare them! They should be flocking to you for advice for their petty little perfect life probs. I love ya E. We all do. Don't let them matter.

  27. Mate we've already talked about this IRL so I don't need to give my opinion here. I will however give you a question to ask them...


    'so you've had a good sniff of my undies; do they smell nice?'

    Just a thought.
    love you brozette
    Uncle Lind x

  28. I refused to cut my hair too. Myeh!

    Who wants to be a boring nobody?

  29. Hi Eden :)

    If you don't mind an 'anonymous' saying so, don't ever change. You've battled a lot, done the best you could with what you had and have done a wonderful job of making a life to be proud of for you and your family.

    What have they ever done?

    You can't help it if they didn't leave such immature playground behaviour at primary school.

    Stay cool ;)

  30. Sorry, but who is being more judgemental here, Eden or the witches of eastwick ? Eden or all these supportive comments ? None of you, even Eden, has addressed the alleged behaviour with any of the alleged perpetrators of the alleged judgements, you've just jazzed-on about it online. Fuck it Eden, if you feel that way about it then address it IRL - your blog is starting to sound whiney, and your commentators are sounding "psycho-phantic" and very, very schoolyard. Pass me a note about it in math tomorrow, okay ???? Love the random blog reader XOXOXOX


Write to be understood, speak to be heard. - Lawrence Powell

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